#653125
(376)<Royall> Hey everyone, did you know it's illegal to destroy coins or bills? <Royall> Those are the govenment's, they are just lending it to you. <Monstro> Which means they can take it back at any moment! <Royall> Yea <Royall> It's called tax. #653227
(419)Kristopolous: I don't think we should have thermometers, speedometers, or odometers. Kristopolous: This is America damn it! Kristopolous: Thermofeet, speedofeet, and odofeet for me, thank you very much! #653295
(809)<lostmx89> ok i like this torrent thing but when you turn off your computer how do you make sure it is still downlowding #653631
(546)<vintendo> yesterday we had to pull the plug on my grandma, i needed the outlet for my laptop. #653759
(637)<Ian-W> lesbian porn <Ian-W> actually lesbian/gay porn <Ian-W> because its like two girls that are guys <CK-[away]> what would you call 2 hermaphrodites <Ian-W> tetris #653828
(2018)<reva> so I was babysitting my cousin's kid the other day. who's like, 15 months old. <reva> he was trying to get up on the computer chair, so i put him up there. <reva> he just starts randomly banging on the keyboard randomly <reva> and the first thing that pops up says "Are you sure you want to delete Internet Explorer?" <reva> I hit "no" (because it's my parents computer). <reva> so he starts hitting more keys... <reva> the next thing that comes up: "Are you sure you want to delete Outlook Express?" <reva> ...I've never had more hope for humanity than that moment. #653976
(1375)<Leonn> Apparently the military has been experimenting with lasers that are supposed to fire at the speed of light. <Glaive> No shit. #654066
(304)<Dann> this is so sad... <Dann> i want to find the "super mario bros movie" on limewire, just for old times' sake... but guess what my first search result is? <Dann> the 40 year old virgin #654091
(376)<Zahava> <3<3happy valentines everybody!!<3<3 <@Silva> Roses are Red <@Silva> Violets are Blue <@Silva> i could never love you <@Silva> because you're 1/16 jew * Zahava has quit IRC (quit: ) #654170
(2087)D1v1d3 8y Z3r0: i got owned by my bio TA earlier in the year D1v1d3 8y Z3r0: she was like "So, what are some possible effects from mutated genes?" D1v1d3 8y Z3r0: i said "Well, it could cause different coding of proteins, or it could cause you to develop special powers, like retractable claws from your hands" D1v1d3 8y Z3r0: the TA was like, "Wrong. Those claws are government implants. Wolverine's mutant power is his healing ability." #654194
(433)<Mr_Owen> I really think I should have been born Asian. Being white sucks, anyway, and I dont like country music or tailgating or alcohol or owning engineless trucks or never mowing my lawn or not wearing a shirt or screwing fat chicks at all. So Ive been trying to come up with a word for someone whos white on the outside, but yellow in the inside. <mirasaki> Like the opposite of Twinkie? <Mr_Owen> Yeah. Exactly. <mirasaki> Well, whatd you come up with? <Mr_Owen> I dont know. The only thing I could think of was a toilet And once I thought about that, damned if I could get it out of my head. <mirasaki> Youre storing information endlessly! You really are Asian! #654551
(51)<Seraph> wow, on gamefaqs, they have this "top 10 games that work on mac" <Seraph> I didn't even know there were games that would run on macs <Zack> Well now that macs can boot windows they're not quite as useless <Seraph> true, but it's just creepy, like a polo player going to nascar #654603
(1004)<blazemore> my brother is in a quake3 clan <blazemore> and he had a ctf game tonight <blazemore> we were walking out of tilt <blazemore> his friend goes "dude hurry up, you're gonna be late for you clan meeting" <blazemore> and these black guys were walking by <blazemore> and looked like they were about to kick our asses #654608
(757)Charmaine----: I'm a 26 year old single mom ;-) Kolobos Psychi: Holy crap! a black women IMed me! @_@ Charmaine----: How did you know I was black? #654674
(1137)<sh4ve> hehe, i wrote a assembly proggy to convert normal numbers to roman ^^ <GodOfGoats> You are so MCCCXXXVII #654677
(125)Begging to Limp: heh Begging to Limp: so, apparently al gore's last speech on global warming flopped badly Begging to Limp: he gave a speech last winter in new york city on global warming Begging to Limp: the result? -1 degree fahrenheit average temperature for the day, the coldest day in new york's history Begging to Limp: when mother nature disagrees, she proves it #654788
(288)<Sid> I'm running a joke so far into the ground it'll become the next major oil supply. #654797
(552)<Greenbox> the place i ordered chicken parmesan from forgot the chicken <Greenbox> so instead of calling and complaining, like a normal person would <Greenbox> I used asterisk and called them from the number of the department of health <Greenbox> and told them a random screening of their food had just been conducted, and they failed miserably <Greenbox> so they were ordered not to serve food until an inspection later today #654840
(361)<Kero> I'm so emo i wear square contacts. #655055
(995)<Heiler> I feel stupid asking this, but how many pints are in a cup? <Swinky> it depends on how big the cup is <Heiler> Thanks, suddenly I don't feel so stupid. #655064
(1021)sw0813: you know, the movie ray really was inspiring sw0813: he was blind, and yet still managed to hit his wife sw0813: that means either of two things: sw0813: 1. his wife was stupid or sw0813: 2. he wasnt really blind sw0813: i mean seriously, was it like "marco," "polo" WHAM! #655157
(441)<Eddo36> sometimes I feel like shit, you know, what sick shit I get off to. but I can't change <Littlelisa> You know eddo, if you never said anything, people may like you <Eddo36> if i never said anything, who would know me? <Littlelisa> thats the point #655201
(569)<Beowulf> ever since I switched to wireless I get disconnected whenever I get a phone call <Beowulf> :( <squirrel_remote> What's your phone number? <Beowulf> fuck you #655302
(1283)<Orphic> you any good at physics? <meowcow> when i run into a wall i usually stop #655324
(746)<kosh> we have a bug that occurs on the 31st of a month <kosh> so once a month we get a bug report <kosh> it gets assigned to a developer within 24 hours <kosh> who then fiddles for a bit before marking it "unable to reproduce"