<Sealab> Leslie Nielson?
<Bagel> Box Cutters?
<Dodge> William Shatners?
<Scotty> Gameboys?
<DotTom> Babies?
<The Amazing Rando> Wesley Snipes?
<seander> Flaming torches?
<Gib Yob> Vials of smallpox?
<Kelvin> Zombies?
<Tomuber> Mutha fuckin snakes?
<Sealab> Leslie Nielson?
<Bagel> Box Cutters?
<Dodge> William Shatners?
<Scotty> Gameboys?
<DotTom> Babies?
<The Amazing Rando> Wesley Snipes?
<seander> Flaming torches?
<Gib Yob> Vials of smallpox?
<Kelvin> Zombies?
<Tomuber> Mutha fuckin snakes?
Far2Paranoid: Built a box with 2x 350Mhz Pentium2, back in '98
Far2Paranoid: The trick was, filled his bathtub w/ glycerin
Far2Paranoid: Took apart a mini-fridge and used the coils to cool the glycerin to ~40F
Far2Paranoid: Then sunk the box so he could OC the CPUs to 1.3Ghz
Far2Paranoid: Coolest shit I've ever seen.
AlbinoChpmnk: If this was sitting in his tub, how did he shower?
Far2Paranoid: After what I just said, what makes you think he showered?
Daryl: wut?
Phil: I just found a pic of me when I was like 6, wearing a red mcdonalds hat with canadian ear flaps that says "mc kids"
Phil: I want to punch myself in the face
dissolve/decay :: wait, what happened?
Rayo :: He owed me money.
Rayo :: So I waited in line today with all the kids.
Rayo :: and told him to pay up in front of all the children, "kids. Santa owes me 40"
"....come on Greg...wheres your Christmas Spirit?"
"Do you want these kids to think Santa is a cheapskate?"
CDSBIGSBY: and it's like, the button, a little slip of paper that says what the button does, and a plastic cover that holds the paper in
CDSBIGSBY: and this dude at work figured that out, 'cause he popped the plastic cover off
CDSBIGSBY: and so we made labels for the two 'empty' buttons on the registers we were on that day
CDSBIGSBY: he didn't utilize the full potential of the opportunity though, as one of his buttons is a happy face and the other a sad face
CDSBIGSBY: but i feel i did mine justice.
CDSBIGSBY: Lane 14 at Meijer's has a Self-Destruct button and a Bat Signal button.
<joeofparma> Through the crowded shops and busy stores of flashy Yuletide glee.
<joeofparma> In I hustled quickly tiring, looks of hopelessness inspiring,
<joeofparma> To the salesman inquiring, "Have you a Nintendo Wii?"
<joeofparma> "Sorry, sir" was his reply "for I have no Nintendo Wii.
<joeofparma> All that's left is PS3."
<Larno> And some electricity cable broke down in my street
<Larno> it was like 6am postman and garbage dudes were there- watching them workin on it and the street was blocked by police cars
<Larno> eventually they knocked at my door so i m in front of a cop, a worker with his helmet a garbage mate, a postman and my neighbour- a huge black guy who works in IT
<Larno> and all I can say is "oh maan the village people became jheovah witnesses"
<Boyzoid> and most of that was drunk by my dad and I
<Boyzoid> I get my liver form him
<jamiejackson> you'll get it from someone else soon
grencez: her friends are much lamer than both of you combined
Declan: The thought of her getting high at a party where everyone is drunk while I sit at home and code Perl or something is kind of too much to bear
CyanFlux: maybe try coding something in c
xShadowGunnx: idk, I agree with that theory. Even if I don't sleep at night because of it or form functioning relationships with new women anymore.
Zintuki: wait.... You've had a functioning relationship with a woman BEFORE?
Opium: Hmm?
lemonlimeskull: Well, as you may know he lost his license months ago
lemonlimeskull: So he's been biking everywhere, which has lead to him losing a bunch of weight
lemonlimeskull: He bikes to Walmart today and as soon as he gets to the electronics department, realizes his wallet's fallen out, probably somewhere along the highway.
lemonlimeskull: So he takes the memory card he wanted, puts it up in his baggy sleeve, and goes to leave.
killjay: Uh oh
lemonlimeskull: Yeah.
lemonlimeskull: Naturally, security stops him as he gets within 5 feet of the front doors. This huge obese woman who is obviously having a really bad day - or just hates her job.
killjay: o shit
lemonlimeskull: She stops him, GRABS his arm, RIPS up his sleeve, and WRENCHES the card out of his hand.
lemonlimeskull: He knows he's screwed so he starts crying in the middle of the fucking store. He cries all the way back to the security office, and everyone's staring at him the whole way.
Opium: So he's sitting in jail right now
lemonlimeskull: That's the awesome part. The manager takes a look at him, notices the bike helmet, poorly fitting clothes, lack of any ID whatsoever, and the fact that he's crying like a three year old.
killjay: .... -_-
lemonlimeskull: Yes. He was let go and the security woman got chewed out for hurting a "retarded kid".
Hohn Junter: heck, lemme give up 2, to stay even!
<Ceru> the insurance company had a major fit
<R3mix> what did she go there for? O_o
<Ceru> she drowned
<Judge-Mental> try pressing the the Caps Lock key
<Khassaki> O THANKS!!! ITS SO MUCH EASIER TO WRITE NOW!!!!!!!
<Judge-Mental> fuck me
Rawr: since December 9th
Neko: dammit i wanted you to do the math and tell me how many weeks
Rawr: three weeks, three days?
Neko: oh good thank you
Rawr: why, is someone asking you?
Neko: no
Neko: i was bleeding then, and i need to keep track of when i need to buy more tampons
Rawr: ...
Rawr: you are the least romantic person EVER
<us98> I've windows 98 installed on my computer
<Sygrke> ok
<us98> now i have a problem
<Sygrke> you repeat yourself dude
PoorLeno : It's called Crysis.
<sic> lmao
<sic> have you been using it?
<kuiper> Well, yeah, but it hasn't been working too well. In fact, I think I may just go back to using paper.
<possible> what did you have to do?
<possible> open the door?
<korn> up yours man
ShaZam: except for my cell phone contract expired and i havent gotten a new one yet
Serrin: Who the FUCK did you think you were talking to?
ShaZam: oh wrong IM tab
Serrin: "nig"? You know you're a white kid who plays WoW all day right?
Serrin: You going to load up your 9 and go defend your turf at the mall from the bloods now? I hear they're moving on the yogurt stand...
<Jake> bummer
<Sky> that's what happened to frosty
<Mr. Fawf> He died
<Mr. Fawf> and then Santa brought him back to life.
<Mr. Fawf> Just like our lord Jesus.
<Jake> ....
<Jake> are you saying jesus is santa?
<Sky> no no
<Sky> he's saying santa saved jesus
<Sky> and therefore.....
<Mr. Fawf> Santa is God!
<Jake> Oh, alrighty
<Jake> I can accept that
Shoudai: Cause monopolies are illegal ^_^
(~bati) where some fat chicks takes a photo of herself where only face is shown
(~bati) or taken from some fucked up angle so she doesn't look ugly?
(p00h) myspace