#764412 (848)
<air>I think i'm addicted to DDR
<air>I need a twelve step program
#764658 (-220)
<thanatos> you know...the word emos sounds like some kind of a cereal
<ka0tix> It does.
<thanatos> eating emos for breakfast
<Blaze> Emo-os
<Blaze> A razor in every bite
<ka0tix> "Emos. Now with free razor blades."
#764724 (713)
<mi09>this spam generator is great. i sent out a million emails for my product
<jives_>how'd it go?
<mi09>great! i gat a 10% return rate
<jives>thats really high!
<mi09>yeah. a hundred thousand people telling me to fuck off
#764876 (7935)
Curt teh Juggler: our graduation ceremony was today, and right when some gamer nerd got his diploma, someone in the audience played the zelda "get item" music and he did the zelda spin-hold-out-item stance
Curt teh Juggler: it was quite possibly the most amazing thing ever.
#764878 (281)
<fugi> 64 bytes from 207.46.197.32: icmp_seq=0 ttl=115 time=69.422 ms
<fugi> 64 bytes from 207.46.197.32: icmp_seq=0 DUP! ttl=115 time=69.887 ms
<fugi> 64 bytes from 207.46.197.32: icmp_seq=0 DUP! ttl=115 time=86.464 ms
<fugi> microsoft.com sends duplicates..
<fugi> it like they got bored of making new security holes so they just brought back some old ones
#765199 (705)
<_Nor> some bird's applied for my dba team leader role
<_Nor> as her interests she lists "Motorsport, reading (Science Fiction, Science) and playing racing games on PS2/PC
<_Nor> I think she's got confused and was actually applying to be my wife
#765266 (1217)
<Scully> Yeah, so far for me "national guard" has meant taking hikes and standing around during demonstrations.
<Scully> I'm not a rent-a-cop dammit
<nightwatch> yah, still better than being in iraq tho
<Scully> i know, my cousin got killed there 2 years ago :(
<jonm> howd that happen
<Scully> his humvee got hit by an RPG
<jonm> wat
<Scully> ?
<jonm> dude im bein serious
<Scully> what?
<jonm> how the fuck can a roleplaying game destroy a humvee
#765367 (-217)
(08:57:00 PM) Nick: If I had could anyone as a Street Fighter character, it'd be Stephen Hawking.
(08:57:31 PM) Nick: You know his special move would be...his wheelchar would fly up in the air and then slam down into the other guy like a meteor or something.
#765549 (29)
<%crazy_clown> php is like teh pron
<Keef> quick, dirty and cheap?
<%crazy_clown> and i fap over it
#765569 (41)
Jmnky127: i found a way to make money
Jmnky127: at school
Jmnky127: people will give me dollars to light my nipples on fire with axe
Jmnky127: or other peoples nipples while they are asleep
Jmnky127: ive made some good money doin that
Jmnky127: like $10
Jmnky127: ive been able to eat a good lunch
#765639 (918)
<CragHack>Theory is when you know everything and nothing works.
<CragHack>Practice is when things work, and noone knows why.
<CragHack>Here we combine theory and practice.
<CragHack>Nothing works and noone knows why.
<Bs> O.o lol'd.
#765649 (1515)
<+pf_work> what's the opposite of <3?
<Lokii> h8
<Rodry> </3
<sdoherty> >3
<Lems> !<3
#765666 (263)
<Sky> The only genders on the internet are Smart, Stupid, and Retard.
#765717 (352)
<DirkGently> IBO's about to turn into a OS war zone.
<iDno> no because...watch this
<iDno> Im going to do something that NO mac user is capable of doing.
* iDno drops it.
#765730 (1014)
<Cell>: i heard tupac was hung like a horse
<Kleptomaniac>: Tupac was shot, he wasn't hung. Read the news sometime.
#765910 (536)
cthulhudream: come on Ben theres gotta be something we can do
||AB|| Benzin: alright I got an idea
||AB|| Benzin: I'm gonna need a pound of rohypnol, a keg, and directions to the nearest sorority house
||AB|| Benzin: and an alibi
||AB|| Benzin: cause they'll trace that shit when 30 girls don't remember what happened or why their pregnant, and all that
cthulhudream: I kinda wanna make larping weapons
||AB|| Benzin: and on the other end of the spectrum...
#765967 (438)
barfcat: So if you used subnetting on a network with Mac's, would that be considered Apple CIDR?
#765978 (513)
<Alwayz> linux is like the inlaw that shows up for christmas and no one knows why he's there, but he cooks amazing food
<Cyriana> and molests your children
#766024 (-119)
<martin rockwell> life is like a vending machine, mate
<martin rockwell> you either have everything you want
<martin rockwell> or you're stuck in it like your fucking change
#766026 (981)
<Taris> also, this I must share.  It comes right out of my physics text book
* Ssithl prepares for brainmelt.
<Taris> A hockey puck, mass 0.115kg, moving at 35 m/s, strikes an octopus thrown onto the ice by a fan.  The octopus has a mass of 0.265 kg.  The puck and octopus slide off together.  Find the velocity.
<Taris> yeah, this is one that the authors put in for those students that stay up late trying to do these
#766028 (-79)
<surge[dd]> I'm Iraqi
<surge[dd]> I'll put a bomb in your mailbox
<tenks> I don't drop bombs
<tenks> I drop tanks
<Thrasher`work> yeah septic tanks
<Thrasher`work> cuz you're full of shit
#766094 (899)
<Niva> I bet whoever invented Jello did so because he had a lot of friends who did acid, and really wanted to fuck with them.
<Niva> "Hey, Matt, pour me a glass of water."
<Niva> "Sure man, I- HOLY SHIT!"
<Andolph> And just to tease them, they stuck all kinds of stuff like doll heads and legs inside the jello
<Niva> Dude, this water isn't pouring?
<Niva> "What are you talking about? You're getting it all over the floor!" "IT'S STILL IN THE PITCHER, MAN!!!"
#766098 (778)
<@gotti> you know you go to a bar too much when quicken suggests it as a scheduled transaction
#766211 (1080)
<nemovc>i once found the text strings stored in the bios of my old 286. not far from the standard "Keyboard error, press F1 to continue." message was "CPU not found. System halted."
<nemovc>i always wondered how they intended to display that message
#766242 (-276)
(bing0):I'm IRC user, short and stout
(bing0):Here is my keyboard, i have loud mouth
(bing0):I like to complain everything i read about
(bing0):Except because ban, i will never logout.