#744290 (1023)
<Hitman2005> I got a new Car stereo the other day, it comes equipped with'VOICE RECOGNITION!'.
<Hitman2005> So if i shout "Rock", it searches, and play rock music, If i shout 'SOUL' it searches for soul music, same with country music etc,etc.
<Hitman2005> Only problem is, i had some children run out in front of my car the other day,
<Hitman2005> I shouted "FUCKING KIDS", Then Michael Jacksons 'THRILLER' came on :S
#744447 (942)
<Drakkel> is it sad that I'm looking through national sex offender databases of areas where I live?
<Lai> I would have tried the personals first, really.
#744548 (52)
<Kkooly> rumick whyd you download the same episode 3 times
<jkpolk> He probably has a triple monitor setup
#745147 (2255)
<Dack Falu> WTF, there are Bomberman fanfics
<Dack Falu> Did that shit have a storyline?
<Stultus> Someone's probably written a fanfic for Tetris
<Saturn V> THE L BLOCK TAKES ME BY THE HAND AND PLUGNES ITSELF NEATLY INTO ME, FORMING A LINE
<Saturn V> I MOAN BUT THEN PART OF ME VANISHES
<Saturn V> FOREVER.
#745175 (354)
<ralph> perl is the lossy compression for programming languages
#745228 (1308)
<Foamy> im a little teapot
<Foamy> short and stout
<Foamy> here is my handle
* Trueborn has kicked Foamy from #totse (get the fuck out)
#745239 (451)
bendingoutward: last night was so hardcore that i moshed with a guy in a wheelchair.
#745385 (911)
<@Sadist> http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/e/ef/Age_of_Consent.png
<@Sadist> data for age of consent all around the world.
<Dano> Is that in your bookmarks?
<@Sadist> its my home page
#745401 (536)
Lord Kagemaro: Want a PS3?
IDLon2000: No
Lord Kagemaro: :/
Lord Kagemaro: I'm bored with mine
#745536 (-71)
<scott> Where were your born?
<scott> homoland?
<scott> Thats not even possible.
#745565 (1600)
<zak> I once almost kissed a girl but then she woke up.. then i woke up
#745889 (507)
<nista> i was explaining to a claimant why a defendant was being sued
<nista> i told him that the defendant violated a federal statute
<nista> he said "VIOLATED A FEDERAL STATUE?!? WHICH ONE, THE LINCOLN MEMORIAL?!?"
#745894 (382)
* Nanobot primarily uses a pi-based counting system
<Nanobot> I know all of the digits in pi
<Nanobot> It's 10
#746293 (770)
<jo> apparently, according to Josh, the Swiss-French border is at risk of being sucked in by a black hole
<jo> they're experimenting with time/space stuff there
<Lewin> haha
<Lewin> try staying out of that one, switzerland
#746302 (-238)
Jmack- i was dreaming of eating a marshmallow
B-dawg- and what happened?
Jmack- when i woke up
b-dawg- then what
Jmack- my pillow was gone......
b-dawg- ........wtf......
#746569 (1169)
<&Dynamic_Inc> ive decided to play a huge prctical joke on my friends
<&Dynamic_Inc> ima slip 2 of them the date rape drug when they are REALLY drunk
<&Dynamic_Inc> then with the help of my other friends, strip them naked, and put them in      bed together, spooning
<&Dynamic_Inc> beat one of them on the ass, so when they wake up its sore
<&Dynamic_Inc> and smear some blood and poop on the sheets
<&Dynamic_Inc> there gunna wake up and be like "O.O fuck."
<&Dynamic_Inc> one of them will turn gay because of it
<&Dynamic_Inc> and they will both act wiered for years
<&Dynamic_Inc> then like 5 years down the road
<&Dynamic_Inc> ill tell them the truth
<&Dynamic_Inc> and then run like fuck
<&Dynamic_Inc> its gunna be great
<%Airegorne> can i help?
#746655 (1183)
<StrangelyUnoriginal>So I was at Walmart, being the financial transaction overlord of register 21.
Rite, and this kid walks up, I ring up his items and he says, "So I heard you like mudkips?" so I acted all confused like he expected me to andhe had a little faggoty giggle then he asked me what his total was and I said, "Your total, IT'S OVER NINE THOUSSSSSSAAAAND!" and my manager was like, "lol wtf?" then I grabbed the pricing scanner and crushed it in my hand.
#746738 (552)
Hooka: I'm going to pee on you
Ralphy_Fox: that'd be hot
lemonlimeskull: Only for a while, then it'd cool off.
#746742 (1433)
<irzyxel> RANDY !
<irzyxel> long time no see !
<irzyxel> hows the kids
<Randy`> still in my testicles, thankfully
#746746 (278)
<sigafoo> your girlfriend is so slutty she gets pass 'by reference'
<HdxEvil> &owned
#746793 (887)
<Etir> I want to see Clinton versus Rice in 2008 just to see if a 3rd party candidate can win on the "I'm Male" platform
#746975 (438)
<ricebowl> lingerie is one of the few items where you expect to pay more for less
#747013 (640)
<pecosdave> Yeah, Snakes on a Plane not a movie you can enjoy alone.
<pecosdave> You can admit to watching the movie with a group, but watching it alone shows signs of having issues.
<jpaganel> LOL
<pecosdave> It's like Rocky Horror.  Watching it alone of the privacy of your own home makes you weird.
<pecosdave> Cross dressing and watching it with a crowd on the other hand is perfect acceptable.
#747032 (1340)
<Mikachu> haha, i misread a japanese word i wanted to look up
<Mikachu> it was kansha, meaning "thanks, gratitude"
<Mikachu> but i wrote in gansha in the dictionary program
<Mikachu> "ejaculation onto partner's face"
<Mikachu> that is a mispronunciation i will be careful to avoid
#747042 (1631)
<Stevie_Kilroy> a little s&m never hurt anyone
<Bungalow Bill> dude
<Bungalow Bill> Yes it did.