#740638
(342)<bloodfart> this homeless dude was eating a pie <bloodfart> that someone bought him <destx> wicked <bloodfart> he got up to cross the road and tripped over, dropping the pie <bloodfart> as if your life couldnt get any worse #740656
(589)<Snojoe> Lemme ask you somethin <Gnarly> Okay... <Snojoe> If you date a two-headed chick, and you want sex, and one of them says no.. <Snojoe> is it rape? <Gnarly> you dont have much free time, do you? <Snojoe> Time is a factor here, man... need an answer #740836
(366)<CptSage> Awesome error message <CptSage> Best one ever <CptSage> A network error has occured. This computer's Internet connection appears to be online. (-66559). #741084
(726)arucardegungrave: Yeah, Jesus tried to save me, but there was no space on his memory card. #741090
(631)<Aiko> Nothing beats the look on a 14-year-old boy's face when his older sister catches him watching femdom porn, smiles and tells him she's already seen that one. <9874354> speaking from experience? <Aiko> Yep. ^_^ #741216
(66)<Snojoe> I am a genius <Snojoe> I just came up with a new game <mbb102488> oh lord, what now? <Gnarly> did you finally figure out hand + dick, joe? <Snojoe> Bash drinking game <mbb102488> lol <Snojoe> I'm serious! go onto the random page <Snojoe> and you take a drink for every quote of like <Snojoe> tubgirl <Snojoe> or even goatse <Gnarly> no, 2 for goatse <Snojoe> uh, no... 2 drinks are reserved for every one about niggers <Gnarly> lmao <mbb102488> wow... <Gnarly> just don't hope you randomly don't get the whole bottom list as random <Gnarly> else you'd be fucked #741226
(77)<jaMESG[champ]> you know, i always thought that i kept my desk kinda clean <jaMESG[champ]> turning the keyboard over and tapping the back of it <jaMESG[champ]> so much shit falls out of it <jaMESG[champ]> jesus <burningpapersun> lol <burningpapersun> jesus fell out of your keyboard? <jaMESG[champ]> yeah <jaMESG[champ]> i kicked that fucker out <jaMESG[champ]> didn't pay rent <jaMESG[champ]> just squatted <jaMESG[champ]> in my keyboard #741596
(458)< kakistos> lol. i liked the java compiler. < kakistos> does the c compiler not tell you what you did wrong? < deviant> C is great < ewan> the Java compiler is all like "you have an uninitialised variable there, would you like a hug?" < ewan> gcc is like "raaagh! I do no bounds-checking! Your mother sucks cocks in hell!" #741630
(1218)<matt____> hey guys is there a way to patch an older redhat server?? <matt____> Linux devcvs 2.2.16-22 #1 Tue Aug 22 16:49:06 EDT 2000 i686 unknown <Evolution> holy hell <Evolution> 2.2.16? <Evolution> just out of curiosity, what's the uptime on that antique? <matt____> devnu11:18am up 2287 days, 2:52, 25 users, load average: 1.76, 1.26, 0.70 <Zathrus> gods #741748
(868)<fatcat> Someone wrote <shit> on the outside of a stall door in the bathroom, and </shit> on the inside. #741806
(411)<@BalefireX> you dated a sea mammal <+Spexor_> if you ask her we never dated <@YucA> man <@YucA> i dunno whats worse <@YucA> that he admits to dating a sea mammal <@YucA> or that said sea mammal wouldnt admit to dating him #741833
(444)<c-unut> pfft slipknot <Finch > slipknot go good <c-unut> I've always seen them sorta like anal sex <Finch> if u want to look at it that way... <c-unut> You know, I appreciate that some may enjoy it, and it has its moments, but at the end of the day, its still fucking shit. #741844
(624)<laszlow> What would you rather wake up to at three in the morning? A dick in your mouth or a clown grinning at you from across the room? <Neal> I can only pick one #741856
(1037)<kimos> You seem (in my (humble) opinion (which doesn't mean much)) to be (or possibly could be) more of a Lisp programmer (but I could be (and probably am) wrong). #741908
(507)<peerce> Some people, when confronted with a problem, think "I know, Ill use regular expressions." Now they have two problems. #742089
(289)<HellDragon> why do i make the same face when i orgasm than when i go backward in my car #742204
(419)<@dekkon> ive got an appointment at the eye doctor on the 13th <@dekkon> finally going to get contacts <@terminal_> contacts are a pain in the ass <+jmx> terminal they go in your eyes #742386
(1025)<HaX.1337> U're all lame as hell here!!!!! I can hack u all in no time! just tell me your ip and u're dead! <Maler.home> try mine <Maler.home> 127.0.0.1 *** Signoff: HaX.1337 (Connection reset by peer) <Damz|dispute> wow. never thought such a retard nick can get his hands on something actually working xD #742408
(2598)<Javin> Oh. <Javin> My. <Javin> God. <Javin> We have a unit here. It's about the size of a small speaker. <Javin> In big letters across the front of it, it says "DATA DESTROYER." <Javin> Some idiot comes into my office just now, and asks, "hey, what is this thing?" <Javin> I say sarcastically, "it's a DVD polisher..." <Javin> Next thing I hear: *GRIND GRIND GRIND* "WHAT THE FUCK?!?!" <Javin> Now they're pissed at ME. <Javin> Because THEY couldn't read. <Javin> Besides, it's not like I gave them PERMISSION to use MY "DVD Polisher." <Javin> I hate people. #742454
(602)<Mirconium>Several sequels have been announced for Gears of War <Mirconium>The new games will include Sprockets of Peace, Pulleys of Neutrality, Fulcrums of Strife, Screws of Fixation, and Wheels of Locomotion. #742547
(1218)<caddis> the hardest thing about buying a macbook is telling your parents you are gay #742578
(957)<dude> this is belgium at its best <dude> our minister of defense takes a chopper to fly 60 kms to go see Al Gore's movie about climate change <dude> beat that #742658
(292)<Rynol> Until individual protons play little quark violins. <Zrith> I imagine attempting to play music on a quark might prove problematic. <Zrith> You either get to figure out where you are in a song, or what the tempo is. <Rynol> Of course, if we were talking string theory then it'd be easier, what with the inherent resonance and all. #742745
(448)<SWTrilman> i'm not huge into porn <Draken> my porn interests, no punning here, come and go <SWTrilman> i used to be into it <SWTrilman> i guess i just got over it <Draken> but she looks so sweet and cute and wholesome... and then she's masturbating to turtles <SWTrilman> or something <Draken> eh, you get burned out on porn <Draken> you either distance yourself for the most part, or seek out more and more extreme porn to fill the gaping hole in yourself. <Draken> then you get arrested for raping a sheep while wearing a Spiderman costume #742772
(832)<Dan_Dinh> *yet? <Dan_Dinh> you haven't done the review ye ? <Spik3balloon> holy crap, dan can see into the future