<mcsuede> and my wife sexed me so i fell asleep
<mcsuede> and when i woke up she had drank my dr pepper
<mcsuede> it was the last one
<mcsuede> i fear it was a plot
<mcsuede> and my wife sexed me so i fell asleep
<mcsuede> and when i woke up she had drank my dr pepper
<mcsuede> it was the last one
<mcsuede> i fear it was a plot
<@mehh_> generated: why? :(
<@mehh_> actually i really need to go...tell me some other time :)
<@mehh_> bbl
<Thunder> wait
<Thunder> why u guys always say pr0n instead of porn ??
Thunder has been kicked by Guardian (No porn on this channel !)
<Cobra> ...
<Cobra> so i was watching a pr0n
<implode> if you want to blow the dealer, thats your option
<{Excabus}> If I was a girl, I'd totally give head for magic cards.
* GLE has quit IRC (Quit: Note to self; stop coming here)
<NG-Buddhist> I was reading a magazine from my English room after my exam, about the most influential people of the last 50 years
<NG-Buddhist> and various pictures were cut out, but i didnt think about it
<NG-Buddhist> then i got to the back of the book, and someone glued in Rosa Park's picture of her sitting there
<Marcus-> HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
<e-shark> my teacher noticed it, and then went on this tangent about how he went through school with one mechanical pencil
<e-shark> and a giant white eraser that was german made, since it was really good at getting rid of mistakes
<e-shark> then my friend states, "yea, those germans are really good at getting rid of big, annoying mistakes."
<SwampFox> if I'm in bed, it's good
<SwampFox> if I'm in Physics, it's a Hallmark holiday
<comwalk> NOBODY is responsible for their own actions.
<comwalk> Remember that.
<comwalk> Holy shit! I killed somebody! Bob made me do it!
<comwalk> Bob: Joe made me do it!
<comwalk> Joe: I blame the media!
<comwalk> Media: Videogames.
<comwalk> Videogames: Personal responsibility?
<comwalk> Personal Responsibility: <AFK>
TheItch: I walk into the bathroom at work, walk up to a urinal, and get ready to... you know.
TheItch: From one of the stalls, I hear a low rumble, which escalates to a groan, and then to a roar.
TheItch: What follows can only be described as the most vile and putrid sounds of human excretion in history. This man apparently pooped out his intestines.
TheItch: Moments later, I hear from the same stall, "Oh god! Someone CALL AN AMBULANCE!"
TheItch: Now, this is an executive restroom at a private bank, and the door has a number lock on it, so it's not some kid trying to be funny. And the man sounded genuinely distressed.
TreesSneezing: lmao! What did you do?
TheItch: Suppressed my laughter as best as I could, zipped up and got the hell out of there.
tohayer: Whatever audio is playing, slows down
tohayer: Like when Dave is disconnecting Hal's memory
tohayer: "Ted... Ted... why are you opening the task manager. You're scaring me, Ted"
<walt> And I'm thinking
<walt> That's so awesome, I should learn how to skate!
<walt> So one of my sister's friends left her skateboard here, and I started to dick around on it
<walt> Long story short, I fell over and broke my wrist
<walt> Now I can't play Tony Hawk.
<norl> lol dumbass
<Archy> 0
<gwizz> and i was watching from my room and i told my dad, so he goes and opens the front door to look
<gwizz> but he didnt know the alarm was set, so it goes off
<gwizz> my mom turns it off, and then one of the policemen come over and were like 'did we go to the wrong house?'
<Gakl> you can put linux on an ipod, but you can't access an ipod from linux. blech
<Summoner> well yeah. Porting an OS gives a much bigger epenis than porting an IO driver
mac: I was waiting in line behind three black guys
mac: they each put in their money press the same button and nothing happens
mac: I walk up put in my money press the same button and four Dr.Peppers fall out!
Newzfoxjr: my friend ding dong door bell ditched a house across the street
Newzfoxjr: he ran to a bush and hid, the guy answered and he was dressed up in a freaking S&M suit
Newzfoxjr: so my friend comes out of the bush, looks at him, AND GOES INTO HIS FREAKING HOUSE.
Newzfoxjr: it's been like 2 hours
<samsim> and got mauled
<samsim> and people were talking about how there should have been better defences put up to prevent people getting into the cage
<samsim> a friend of mine suggested setting up some kind of deterrent
<samsim> for example, putting some sort of fierce animal in the cage, which would attack anybody who climbed in
kaytodaizzik: "cautious optimism"
kaytodaizzik: It's like, I'm pretty sure the Sun will rise tomorrow.
kaytodaizzik: But chances are someone's gonna try and fuck me
kaytodaizzik: So I wear sunglasses and a buttplug.
<yogurt1> I couldn't hear him because I had earmuffs but I knew thats what the kid says. So after mouthing off I punch the kid in the face and walk home. like an hour later the kids mom comes to the door and says shes going to sue me for punching...her 13 year old daughter.
<benji443> HAHA LMAO!
<jiirco> ROFL YOU PUNCHED A GIRL!!!!!!!!!
<yogurt1> She was wearing a hat and a hood for fuck sakes!
Ignus Firestorm: And you'll never hear from me again.
Ignus Firestorm: =]
CanYouSaySanity: Oh...darn....
CanYouSaySanity: ...
CanYouSaySanity: That was by far, the worst threat in the history of mankind.
CanYouSaySanity: It wouldn't even work on France.
Erik: well, then again, them mexicans sure are able to get things past fences
<Fenris> I need to get a monitor
<W1N9Zr0> yeah, stop guessing what's on the screen