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(2648)<FBD> i had a teacher named Ms. Packman. <FBD> so im the last day of school, i dressed up as a blue ghost, and charged at her. <FBD> i got suspended, starting the next year... #353049
(635)<orkin> i hate it when im cold but sweaty <orkin> like my hands and feet <orkin> my feet are cold <orkin> but they are sweating <orkin> if i put socks on them <orkin> they will sweat in the socks <Paradigm> I know the feeling <Paradigm> it's like dreaming that your peeing and waking up all wet. <orkin> yeah.. <orkin> kinda <orkin> wait <orkin> wtf <Bejjan> lol <@Petah> lol <Paradigm> WHAT ?! <Bejjan> *falls of his chair* #353088
(349)Vortosis: The best line is something my friend Brandon yelled at a chick across the street while we were skating Vortosis: "Hey wanna go half and half on a baby!?" #353105
(468)<pothead2234> sometimes i wonder what are all the words other than breasts and food are for <This_girl> well, words you use in order to reach em #353125
(613)<Prowler> I rekon if i were a super hero i would call myself "Proctastinator" with the power to Leap tall buildings, control time, shoot fireballs out of my ass and other cool super hero stuff <Prowler> but i'd never get around to doing any of it #353175
(843)<mgr> I was under the impression that the program was fully functional? I am not correct? <kitchen> Depends on what you think 'fully functional' means <kitchen>The Rebels believed the DeathStar to not be 'fully operational' and look what that got Alderan. #353546
(838)<@koenig> I just had a very fun time with a telemarketer who called my home. <@koenig> She was telling me that I had "won in a drawing" and that I might have won a Hummer or a trip to Orlando and some other crap. <@koenig> So I said, "Hey, them Hummers is sure nice." <@koenig> "Oh yes," she replies. <@koenig> "I bet they can haul a lot in them Hummers." <@koenig> "Oh certainly." <@koenig> "Do you think they could hold something that was like 6' long?" <@koenig> "Most likely." <@koenig> "And weighed like 150-200 lbs.?" <@albus> oh dear. <@koenig> "Possibly." <@koenig> "Well, I'll cut right to hte chase. Do you think they could carry a dead body?" <@koenig> "Uhhhh." * albus hears police sirens. <@koenig> :) <@albus> you should use her as a reference when you apply for a security clearance. <@koenig> Well you realize I didn't actually claim to HAVE a dead body. I was purely curious, in case I get into the funeral service business. <@koenig> It's my new idea, "Die With Style, Inc." where instead of a hearse you drive out in a Hummer. <@albus> ... #354032
(694)<rS-D00k> this channel is more inactive than my herpes infection after valtrex <rS-D00k> although even with valtrex it is possible to spread herpes to others <rS-D00k> talk to your doctor before taking valtrex if you're on a mao inhibitor #354226
(2505)<Philth> god i'm stupid <Stinger> yes you are <Philth> Stinger: Have you heard the jokes they don't tell fags? <Stinger> yes <Stinger> dumbass <Philth> what ones? <Stinger> i cant tell you <Stinger> fag <Philth> DAMN that really backfired.. #354244
(784)[aiken_drum] Holy shit. [aiken_drum] Have I just come into a random room and people are talking about tentacle sex? [aiken_drum] I love this program. #354453
(1804)***Welcome to MSN Support*** <MSN Assistant> Hello how can I help? <Divination> I recently downloaded msn 6.2 and it has been giving me problems <MSN Assistant> Yes, please continue. <Divination> I cant stop drinking I think Ive turned into an alcoholic *MSN Assistant has left the conversation. #354456
(231)smallchild (andrew@j105.bkr50.jaring.my) has joined. «46 people» * @Liam touches smallchild...... <@Liam> I'm so sorry #354490
(571)<mojo>parents are weird <mojo>So there I am playing my drums just now <mojo>first im "skating on thin ice" <mojo>and I keep going <mojo>now aparently im "in hot water" <mojo>go figure #354508
(2316)<Dyl4N>a mosquito landed on my screen and i went to right click on it and close it... <Dyl4N>then i realized i should get out more <Jesse>send me a screen shot <Jesse>wait #354520
(2476)troupe: oh shit, i just heard a car crash outside cyateon: oh shit cyateon: go loot the corpses before they respawn #354939
(1569)<Dianuzza> there is a big gay community here in Paris <usnjay> yeah. <usnjay> it's called "Paris". #356147
(637)<pbqd> "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals." -Warning label on a swedish chain saw #356150
(59)cochese 04: I've been meaning to murder a lot of people cochese 04: But that Matlock guy is really good at catching murderers cochese 04: So I dunno cochese 04: I don't want Andy Griffith coming in my house and proving I did it #356183
(838)<GWH> funny when you and your girlfriend are fighting over aim <GWH> and then you realize you dont have to sit there till she answers, you can do other shit too #356275
(487)<Maxim> rhetorical jeopardy is a pretty tricky game, you know? :/ #356674
(281)Yami: Three men who were lost in the forest were captured by cannibals. The cannibal king told the prisoners that they could live if they pass a trial. The first step of the trial was to go to the forest and get ten pieces of the same kind of fruit. So all three men went separate ways to gather fruits. Yami: The first one came back and said to the king, "I brought ten apples." The king then explained the trial to him. "You have to shove the fruits up your ass without any expression on your face or you'll be eaten." Yami: The first apple went in... but on the second one he winced out in pain, so he was killed. Yami: The second one arrived and showed the king ten berries. When the king explained the trial to him he thought to himself that this should be easy. 1...2...3...4...5...6...7...8... and on the ninth berry he burst out in laughter and was killed. Yami: The first guy and the second guy met in heaven. The first one asked, "Why did you laugh? You almost got away with it" The second one replied, "I couldn't help it, I saw the third guy coming with pineapples." #356753
(1333)<rhyann> hey i got a floppy with a virus and i wana now if its ok to put it next to the other floppys or do i gotta wait for it to get better to put it back in the box #356805
(2576)<v_9> All those who believe in Telekenesis raise my hand. #357274
(1007)<Leto> I had a password I could type entirely with my right hand for a while <Nugget> why? <Leto> so I could unlock my screen while drinking coffee #357526
(793)<Nosnam> Who? <mystie> this dude on jeopardy, he was on his 20th return today <Nosnam> Woah <mystie> I didn't happen to catch if he won again today <NeoHentaiMaster> he is a robot sent from the future to win the prize money so others cant <NeoHentaiMaster> he will slowly drain the world economy until all collapses into chaos <Nosnam> George Bush is on jeopardy?