<_abuse> you are so right strepto..
<_abuse> you are so right strepto..
<cj_> i managed to add a quart of oil to my car before losing interest in RL.
<cj_> cs?
<@Amily> as if it was all your doing? :)
<@Gesten> I should've been born two years earlier so I could ahve ahd a voice.
<@Amily> you don't have a voice?!?!
<@Amily> you're a mute!
<@Gesten> You didn't know I was a mute?
<@Amily> well i know now, and it makes me immensely happy
<@Gesten> No seriously...my neck hit a countertop when I was a kid. I can only make high-pitched muffled noises that sound like squirrels mating.
<NES> speaking of your mom jokes getting me in trouble
<NES> my friend rocky's mom died of cancer
<NES> I had no knowledge of this cancer, I hadn't known him very long
<NES> and I had for a while this obnoxious habit of doing those your mom jokes
<NES> repeating something someone said and inserting their mom
<NES> so I sit down at lunch one day and I hear him say "she died of cancer"
<NES> and I said "your MOM died of cancer"
<NES> *silence*
<mad> i just started blaring tunes, thinking i had only my headphones on
<mad> but i forgot to turn off my speakers..
<mad> i bet i just woke everyone in the house up
<Gold> lol
<Gold> nice one
<mad> meh
<mad> im drunk
<mad> what do i care
<GreenWrecKingBall> hahaha
<GreenWrecKingBall> lucky it wasn't porn
<mad> omg
<mad> that's exactly what i was about to type
<mad> "lucky it was was rage against the machine, instead of this pron mpg i was about to load up"
<mad> since the only reason i realized my speakers were on is my feet could feel my sub kicking
<mad> i doubt the pron woulda done that until about half way in
<inetd_> so i'm gonna ask random peoples "if you were on a bus full of gay guys, would you get off?"
<ShadowRage> slave
<ShadowRage> look at the jumpers on it
<ShadowRage> there will either be an M or an S, or just mater or slave
<ShadowRage> pop the jumpter on slave
<ShadowRage> jumper*
<ShadowRage> if it's the primary hd, then master
<Shempo> Well...Rawr..
<Shempo> I plugged the bitch im
<Shempo> in8
<Shempo> in*
<Shempo> it rawred at me
<Shempo> CLIIIKC CLICKCLIIICCK
<Shempo> ..now what?
<ShadowRage> access the bios
<ShadowRage> (either escape, f1 or delete when your computer first powers on)
<Shempo> yea..
<Shempo> and?
<ShadowRage> what kinda BIOS do you have?
<Shempo> dunno
<ShadowRage> this is on an older machine?
<Shempo> 1 year
<ShadowRage> hmmm
<ShadowRage> ok, are you in the bios?
<Shempo> ..no
<Shempo> That'd require restarting.
<ShadowRage> ... you added this HD with the computer on?!
<Shempo> >.>
<Shempo> <.<
<Shempo> :D
<ShadowRage> ..on your current machine?
<ShadowRage> right now?
<Shempo> o.o
<ShadowRage> .....................................................
<Shempo> Run?
<ShadowRage> lowkey: give me the learnin' stick.
<Shempo> ...
<Shempo> :(
<Shempo> The 2x4?
* ShadowRage smacks Shempo with a 2 by 4
<Shempo> :(
<Shempo> Yea...dumb mistake..
<ShadowRage> ....you seriously plugged it in with the machine ON?!
<Shempo> Possibly harmful?
<ShadowRage> ......
<ShadowRage> yes
<ShadowRage> very
<Shempo> o.o
<ShadowRage> ..it's a surprise your computer didnt explode and kill you in the process.
<insight> Well, you could try NASA's "things not yet and never will be invented"-department or something.
<DS> sometimes both.
<CurvyEm> I'm actually topless now, i couldn't be arsed to wear a top anymore
<DS> it is a fine line.
<DS> Well, that was a nice random interjection into a completely random conversation.
it seems like every time i re-install, something goes wrong
RaceTM: i have yet to get a flawless ghost image
RaceTM: its pissing me off
lol
RaceTM: and im sure its probably one dumb program i always install that messes things up
Veritech Ferret: hehe
Veritech Ferret: Windows
<Tone> Your little brother was FAPPIN' to your girlfriend?
<Myuutsuu> All of his game files will be mysteriously deleted.
<Alphonse> Inside several folders.
<Myuutsuu> He will have a piss stain in his bed the size of China.
<Myuutsuu> He will have his YGO cards stolen.
<Gojirott> Myuu: Use milk :X
<Gojirott> or better yet, mayo
<Myuutsuu> And I will pay one of the kids at his school to kick his ass.
<+Olanis> Is that possible?
<Calren> I'm throwing all my resources into running everything at top speed, lol
<+Andross> um, how do you do that
<Sterri> lovely, you trying to warm the room up?
<Calren> Andross: chant very, very hard
<Calren> and currently I'm trying to toast a poptart
<Sterri> on the cpu, right?
<Calren> it's sitting behind the fan
[Skunk] thats nice but the only time i've ever come across gay porn is accidentally.
[NARHDD] Its amazing how people always claim that their eyes just wonder from a reg. porn site to a gay one (with help of ctrl + F)
[Skunk] Man I knew I shouldve uninstalled VNC
<Wallrod> i have to hear my dad take a shit
<Wallrod> EVEN DEATH METAL DOESNT COVER ALL THE FREQUENCIES MY DAD'S ASS BROADCASTS ON
<XeNoX> Still in the Garden Of Eden you gullible bitch.
(Lady Renegade) more than you want, I'm sure :)
(JHawk111420) ill take that as a challenge ;-)
(Lady Renegade) take it any way you want sweetie
(JHawk111420) k, how old are ya?
(Lady Renegade) probably too old for you, but let's pretend I'm 20 ;)
(JHawk111420) k, what do ya look like?
(Lady Renegade) before or after I'm dressed up?
(JHawk111420) both :-D
(Lady Renegade) well......after I'm dressed up, I have long sexy red hair, nails painted red to match the slinky dress I have on, stiletto heels, pouty lips, green eyes, boobs out to here, and a smile that stops
traffic
(JHawk111420) and before your dressed up?
(Lady Renegade) before I'm dressed up, I'm bald and wearing boxers...sometimes my weenie is peeking out
(Lady Renegade) hello?
(Lady Renegade) hello?
(Lady Renegade) hello ....
<EVILteddy> hehehe\
<Bakaneko-kun> whatd you do?
<EVILteddy> mum had a cows heart out for the cats dinner
<EVILteddy> i took it to the door and took a huge bite of it
<Bakaneko-kun> really?
<EVILteddy> yep
<EVILteddy> it tasted horrible
<EVILteddy> it was raw and bloody
<EVILteddy> they called me a heritec and ran soooo fast^_^
<EVILteddy> i was pissing my self laughing all day it was like the best thing ive ever done to a morman
<PA_stoned> lookit that, i guess being stoned does not necessarily make me horny!
<DS_lonely> *gasp* and i bet your not stoned.
<PA_stoned> yes i am!
<DS_lonely> WHAT!
<PA_stoned> why else would i be eating pussy with my finger?
<PA_stoned> oops!
<DS_lonely> noice!
<PA_stoned> i meant puddding
<Wargon> blocked the ports now
<tfg> AOL blocks all that shit for me by default
<tfg> They clearly know what 99% of their users are like
<Spanky-G> like?
<Spanky-G> 99% of their users hardly know what a computer is
--- Ghostalker is now known as Muad
<dave> /msg nickserv register <snip> <snip take 2>@comcast..net
--- Muad is now known as Muad_dib
<dave> opps
<MH2> opps indeed
<dave> yea so whats new?
<MH2> Well
--- Muad_dib is now known as Ghostalker
<-- Ghostalker (Ghostalker@uplink-1EB07998.lutn.cable.ntl.com) has left #Uplink (Rejoining because of user@host change)
--> Ghostalker (Ghostalker@graveyard.net) has joined #Uplink
<MH2> I now have access to your email account
<MH2> That's pretty new
<-- Squall has quit (Ping timeout)
<MH2> You have 0 new messages, by the way
<chippy> it was daytime
<notick> buy a unix help manual.
<ZiggyPopFoo> i dont have unix in have openbsd u fucking def bastard.
<notick> oh, my bad! (idiot)
*ZiggyPopFoo forgives notick
<ZiggyPopFoo> dont worry i have had nowledge about openbsd for yers its just open bsd is the hardest one of them all, ull learn as mich about as i know some day.
<notick> Shower me with your god-like wisdom, ZPF
<ZiggyPopFoo> wisdom??? I HAVE OPENBSD!!!!
<the|navigator> That's pretty sad.
<dsbnh|VC> first thing that hit me was "may contain nuts"