#109533 (35)
<KeeperX> if i say anything nonsensical
<KeeperX> i'm cleaning my keyboard
<KeeperX> sjkl;'
<KeeperX> fvgbhnjkl;'ccfvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvb n  bvcxzxcvbbnm,./,mnbvcxzAsdfghjkl;';lkjhwqwertyuioip['
<KeeperX> k
<KeeperX> i'm done
<KeeperX> there were pubes in my keyboard
<KeeperX> i dunno how they got there
<Todd> sick
#109611 (198)
<Rowdy> Do ppl even test this shit?
<Rowdy> Bloody FreeBSD.  It was better when it was elite and there were no fucking n00bz submitting lame ports.
<Rowdy> I may have to switch to OpenBSD, just to be snooty.
#109624 (698)
<uTi|Veridian> my HLTV tops out at about 30 people - then lags like your mom
<cyde> so tell me... if i used my mom in conjunction with your server... could we top 60?
<uTi|Veridian> can your mom handle 30 teenage boys?
<cyde> the question is....can 30 teenage boys....handle my mom?
#109801 (165)
<caesium> dude, like 2 years ago.. i was on the great canadian mine buster at wonderland and my tits were osciallting in a very unflattering way.. since then, ive known i needed to loose weight.
#109855 (17)
<Shads> fuk owning a honda
<Shads> thats the same as addmitting u have a small penis
<Shads> :/
#110000 (358)
<scanline> What's the past tense of netsplit? netsplat?
#110001 (230)
<splice> a duran, a thomson twin, eddie money, huey lewis, and keith richards
<splice> get those clowns together and you've got cocaine voltron
#110038 (173)
<Allahkat> My wedding registry.
<Allahkat> http://shop.hbc.com/giftregistry/
<asshat> I know this is going to read stupid
<asshat> but why do you register
<asshat> to have people by you stuff??
<sueb[work> so people know what kind of gifts you want
<unchellmatt> To get swag, buddy!
<Allahkat> You register so people can buy you stuff that you picked out for your house.
<asshat> like an amazon wish list.
<unchellmatt> You get gifties!
<Allahkat> So you don't end up with ugly shit.
<asshat> ahh, I see.
<unchellmatt> That's going to happen anyway.
<Albatross> and so you don't get 20 food processors
<aeonite> You can do a lot of things with 20 food processors
<Allahkat> And 50 babies.
#110204 (695)
<eva> In Thailand, Police believed a young girl committed suicide after getting stuck on a level of Bomberman.
<eva> ahhaha thats gold
<Spacecow> 09 Oct 02
<etoilet> i hate suicide bombers
#110264 (1040)
SA_Williamson> Hello, who is the owner of this channel?
* Knirch goes down for maintenance.
<SA_Williamson> !list
<SA_Williamson> ok
<SA_Williamson> just to let everyone know i have a federal supena
<SA_Williamson> and will be entering you fileservers lawfully
<Knirch> lol
* Knirch sets mode: +b *!*saw@*.lab.fbi.gov
* dgk2 sets mode: -b *!*saw@*.lab.fbi.gov
<dgk2> not a good idea
<dgk2> Knirch .
<dgk2> —I-n-v-i-s-i-o-n— Nick: SA_Williamson
<dgk2> > Address: saw@pc1xd3.lab.fbi.gov «Government»
<dgk2> > Name: fbi
<dgk2> > SA_Williamson is using modes +ix
<dgk2> > SA_Williamson is connecting from *@pc1xd3.lab.fbi.gov
<dgk2> > Channels: #tvseries
<dgk2> > Server: fla.us.atomicchat.net, Atomic-Chat
<dgk2> > Channels in common with SA_Williamson: #tvseries
<CJdude[20]> whoa
<SkRiBBleZ> ok that's not cool
#110362 (77)
<ecoli> i think that drugging and assault are an important part of foreplay
<ecoli> yeah
<ecoli> like
<ettenyl> roofies will do that.
<ecoli> if i wanted something that would fuck me back, i'd bang a goat.
#110428 (351)
(lupin) Animal Crossing bothers me.  They give you an axe, they give you a
+shovel.  They give you a vast expanse of tree-covered land.  But they don't
+let you kill and bury people.
#110431 (211)
(InkBlot) From CNN: Rumsfield: Turkey plans will go ahead.
(InkBlot) good to see Thanksgiving won't be canceled this year.
#110510 (795)
<+DoomSooth> I went to Providence Middle School in Virginia.
<+DoomSooth> The cheerleaders had PMS in big letters on their uniforms.
#110779 (230)
<dwerg> qiv -femitd 10 `find /home/giel/pr0n | egrep -v ("horse"|"animal")`
<dwerg> Heheh, oeps.
<giel> lol
#110790 (82)
<turtletip> a seeing-eye dog was undressing me with its eyes, so I maced him
<turtletip> it got all frantic and ran its owner infront of a moving vehicle
<turtletip> pretty funny
#111050 (529)
<tragic> canada is basically USA Expansion Pack
#111167 (181)
- #sex unable to join channel (invite only)
#111330 (760)
/* After a long long idle pause */
<c4_faker> ...silence is a form of consent...
<zeedo> so you can rape a mute woman legally?
<zeedo> nice
<c4_faker> hahahhahaa
<c4_faker> whats she gunna do...scream in sign language?
<c4_faker> :P
<zeedo> yeh, they call it "punching"
#111338 (17046)
<JonJonB> Purely in the interests of science, I have replaced the word "wand" with "wang" in the first Harry Potter Book
<JonJonB> Let's see the results...
<JonJonB> "Why aren't you supposed to do magic?" asked Harry.
<JonJonB> "Oh, well -- I was at Hogwarts meself but I -- er -- got expelled, ter tell yeh the truth. In me third year. They snapped me wang in half an' everything
<JonJonB> A magic wang... this was what Harry had been really looking forward to.
<JonJonB> "Yes, yes. I thought I'd be seeing you soon. Harry Potter." It wasn't a question. "You have your mother's eyes. It seems only yesterday she was in here herself, buying her first wang. Ten and a quarter inches long, swishy, made of willow. Nice wang for charm work."
<JonJonB> "Your father, on the other hand, favored a mahogany wang. Eleven inches. "
<JonJonB> Harry took the wang. He felt a sudden warmth in his fingers. He raised the wang above his head, brought it swishing down through the dusty air and a stream of red and gold sparks shot from the end like a firework, throwing dancing spots of light on to the walls
<JonJonB> "Oh, move over," Hermione snarled. She grabbed Harry's wang, tapped the lock, and whispered, 'Alohomora!"
<JonJonB> The troll couldn't feel Harry hanging there, but even a troll will notice if you stick a long bit of wood up its nose, and Harry's wang had still been in his hand when he'd jumped - it had gone straight up one of the troll's nostrils.
<JonJonB> He bent down and pulled his wang out of the troll's nose. It was covered in what looked like lumpy gray glue.
<JonJonB> He ran onto the field as you fell, waved his wang, and you sort of slowed down before you hit the ground. Then he whirled his wang at the dementors. Shot silver stuff at them.
<JonJonB> Ok
<JonJonB> I have found, definitive proof
<JonJonB> that J.K Rowling is a dirty DIRTY woman, making a fool of us all
<JonJonB> "Yes," Harry said, gripping his wang very tightly, and moving into the middle of the deserted classroom. He tried to keep his mind on flying, but something else kept intruding.... Any second now, he might hear his mother again... but he shouldn't think that, or he would hear her again, and he didn't want to... or did he?
<melusine > O_______O
<JonJonB> Something silver-white, something enormous, erupted from the end of his wang
<JonJonJonB> Then, with a sigh, he raised his wang and prodded the silvery substance with its tip.
<JonJonJonB> 'Get - off - me!' Harry gasped. For a few seconds they struggled, Harry pulling at his uncles sausage-like fingers with his left hand, his right maintaining a firm grip on his raised wang.
#111427 (602)
<meeps> i saved a girls life tonight
<DJ-Quack> well meeps?
<meeps> this terrorist came around the corner and tried to kill her so i shot his head off
<DJ-Quack> omfg meeps
<hpr> lol :P
<meeps> hahaha
<DJ-Quack> you asshole
<DJ-Quack> ;[
<LawnMM> did he respawn?
<meeps> Yeah, next round
#111522 (781)
<Squidwerd> *sings* Ooooooooo-oh supersadomasochistinecrobestiality, it's when you get a hard-on making Lassie a fatality!
#111564 (579)
<arry75> hi
<Aethelwulf> ?
<arry75> asl pls
<Aethelwulf> Speak english
<arry75> age sex location please
<Aethelwulf> Why does it matter?
<Aethelwulf> 53 male Lituhuania
<arry75> just wannaknow k
<arry75> ok
<arry75> i m looking for a girl
<arry75> i hope u wont mind
<Aethelwulf> Try a place called "outside"
<Aethelwulf> I heard there is quite a few
<arry75> k
<arry75> thanks
<arry75> no body is there
<arry75> any way thanks
#111569 (429)
* JuhorNieger slaps BlackWolf|Away around a bit with a large trout
* BlackWolf takes the trout out of Submerge's hands, and puts it back in the river. (Trout Saved: 96 ~~~><)))'>~~~><)))'>~~~)
#111571 (424)
<Tonberry> MPs do the same thing on a military base as regular cops do in a city
<metaldark> harass blacks and skaters?