#107295 (148)
<Blue> yeah, a copy of it was found in a desert
<Blue> the guy turned it into the newspaper or something instead of doing the right thing
<Blue> which of course is ebaying it
#107296 (29)
<Fembot> what did one "racing stripe" in jitspoe's toilet say to another one?
<Fembot> "are you alright? you look a little flushed."
#107298 (348)
<Xenophon> I was talking to this really cute girl, when I was on a walk with my parents. I hadn't seen her in years. After exchanging university experiences, I asked for her ph # and my dad jumped out of the woodwork and said "I'll memorize half of it for ya!"
#107303 (112)
<GaNja> anyone here good at setting up video cards?
<Blue> nope, im horrible at it myself, so bad in fact i dont even havea video card
<GaNja> oh
<GaNja> that sucks
#107304 (759)
<Zimbu> heh, the ad bar on fark speaks for itself...
<Zimbu> "1000s of naked women on your desktop! NSFW!: 18 comments"
<Zimbu> "Revenge Lady- My story of complete and utter humiliation: 8 comments"
<Zimbu> "i saw a turtle: 1136 comments"
#107307 (239)
<Borgus> How does one go about becoming an op?
<Fembot> kneepads, a dark room, and a strong stomach
#107311 (297)
<basschimp> sitting down in a kilt is easy. after the first few times.
<Yardbomb> Heehee
<Yardbomb> lol
<Ant-> after the first few "AWW SWEET JESUS MAN"s?
#107314 (189)
<+Jasper> SourceX, its because of people like you that they put up signs that say "Please don't touch the animals" in zoos
<+Jasper> -P
<@SourceX> i wouildnt do it with other ppl around anyways
<@SourceX> the signs are pointless
#107324 (487)
<dragondyne> doritos are just as good though
<dragondyne> but the residue on your hands SUCKS ASS
<Mog116> yeah
<dragondyne> you need gloves to eat them
<AvaLance204> Yes doritos mess up your hands
<shadow> I don't mind the residue
<Mog116> dorito residue sucks
dragondyne> they should come with a pair of latex gloves
<dragondyne> they would sell more
<shadow> I usually eat chips when I'm not using my hands
<shadow> er
<AvaLance204> :o
<shadow> you know what I mean
<AvaLance204> lofl
<dragondyne> wtf
<shadow> when I'm not using my hands for anything else
<Mog116> what
<shadow> ah crap
<shadow> screw it
<dragondyne> do you stick your head in the bag and rotate or something
#107325 (-7)
<@ott> i work with a guy who has zacklee
<@ott> his breath smells zacklee like his ass
#107329 (214)
<Cyber_Akuma> They REALLY want to make dying in the game realistic
<Cyber_Akuma> The pc insantly locked up when i died
#107339 (16)
(Kixx^) Where can I download internet ?
(@Osc) Kixx^ goto http://www.irchelp.org/download for info on getting files of any kind via IRC.
Kixx^) *lol*
#107346 (201)
<Devilmouse> help!!!
<Devilmouse> * Yam invites you to join #gay
<Devilmouse> i joined and they wont let me back out
#107351 (305)
<stealth_> my brother downloaded cm4 from kazaa
<stealth_> and... it went pretty well for him
<stealth_> he had been playing for about 1½ hours
<stealth_> then this message pops up.
<stealth_> "had fun? well fu you and go buy the game you warez haxx0r"
<stealth_> then the game crashed :)
#107354 (344)
<nylint> a pedophile and a little girl were walking into the woods
<nylint> and the little girl said 'these woods are scary at night, mister'
<nylint> and the pedophile said 'you're scared?  i have to walk back alone!'
#107355 (432)
volsung> *Sigh*
jack> sigh what?
volsung> Talking to my mom again.
volsung> I tried to explain that job #1 is modeling the effects of the solar wind on the Earth's magnetic field and that my advisor's model wasn't working at all.
volsung> Her immediate response was "Well, that's because you aren't                taking into account the effect of consciousness on the charged particles."
volsung> I did not know how to respond to that.
#107359 (397)
||RoGuE||: yesterday, my sister came to me and asked me where were my parents, and she smelled like beer
||RoGuE||: and i said... Minni, by the smell of your breath i can tell you have been drinking
||RoGuE||: and then she said... well, by the smell of your breath i can tell you have been sucking cock
[StOrM]: what did you do rogue?
||RoGuE||: i brushed my teeth ¬_¬
#107362 (871)
<||RoGuE||>: yesterday, my sister came to me and asked me where were my parents, and she smelled like beer
<||RoGuE||>: and i said... Minni, by the smell of your breath i can tell you have been drinking
<||RoGuE||>: and then she said... well, by the smell of your breath i can tell you have been sucking cock, you bitch!
<[StOrM]>: what did you do rogue?
<||RoGuE||>: i brushed my teeth ¬_¬
#107363 (1020)
(@Nick^) we were about to start an important exam yesterday
(@Nick^) and the male teacher says "any mobile phones turn them out and put them on the desk at the front"
(@Nick^) and my friend questioned him about whether it was necessary to put it on the desk at the front, blah blah
(@Nick^) then the teacher walks down the row of people to check, and says to my /other/ friend, "Is that a mobile phone in your pocket?"
(@Nick^) and my friend turned round and said "No he's just pleased to see you"
(@Nick^) I almost got kicked out for crying with laughter
#107364 (970)
<Analogy> I haven't taken a shower in days.
<Analogy> DAYS.
* silentjoe backs away from analogy
<Analogy> My hair has so much oil in it, Bush is gonna invade it next.
#107367 (141)
* djenk feels like his energy has been completly drained out of him
* muiredach pumps energy back up in djenk
<muiredach> ooops, that was the airpump ;-)
* djenk now feels listless and bloated too ;/
#107371 (714)
<NekoGuy> Oh my fucking god I'm 16 years old, engaged, with a 2.0 average planning to make a career out of politics, I spend my entire day on IRC, looking at porn and fantasizing about a race of catgirls that will never exist.
<NekoGuy> IT JUST FUCKING HIT ME.
* NekoGuy kills himself
#107373 (289)
< kriptik> !sites
< BassBoy> !sites
< kriptik> !geeks-in-g-strings
< BassBoy> !nude-animals
< kriptik> !greasy-ewok-bitches
< BassBoy> !underage-gerbil-sluts
< kriptik> you win :(
#107374 (88)
<eXa|The_Professor> my grandpa invented cheez-wiz
<eXa-r|SirHump|NS> sweeeet
<eXa|The_Professor> no i'm just screwing with you
#107380 (264)
* Rask says AHEM extremely loudly.
* Blasphemy gives Rask a cough drop.
<Denise> SARS! :o
<Chickita_Banana> lol
* Denise passes out masks.
* Rask sticks it in his nose and says AHEM again.
<Chickita_Banana> a cough drop in your nose?
* Denise watches it shoot out of Rask's nose and hit Chickita in the face.
<Denise> Maybe it's a nose drop.
<Chickita_Banana> lol
* Chickita_Banana throws it at Denise
* Denise gets it lodged in her throat.
<Blasphemy> o.o
* Denise does the heimlich on herself.
<Blasphemy> Denise.
* Denise lives.
<Blasphemy> You're wierd.
* Denise spears Blasphemy.
* Denise drags him to her igloo.
* Chickita_Banana watches
<Blasphemy> Plz don't rape me >_< I'll do anything!