#101269
(1015)<@Stormrider> If I got arrested and had one phone call, I'd call the police station with a bomb scare #101283
(518)<BloodFromStone> "You wouldn't think incest was wrong if you had cousins as hot as mine." #101306
(147)<dash> HEY BITCH WHERE'S MY SANDWICH * MogOfGlory unzips his pants <dash> mmm reuben #101342
(134)<Ck3> im still laughing:>> i mean its like you ate someth bad and im trying to tell you but im laughing so hard i cant tell you, and i look at you eat it and think that it rolled in the bong water and im dying of laughter and you're like enjoying the chocolate so much:>> <antishok> HOLY FUCKGIN SHIT <antishok> U MOTHER FUCKER <antishok> U DIDNT TELL ME IT ROLLED IN BONG WATER YESTERDAY #101346
(34)<@BcK> mexicans steal cabbage patch doll <@BcK> to get the birth certificate #101354
(94)<Tarrasque> damm it.. fucken waiting for my GF to get home... I an so fucken bored <toxik> i usually cant wait for my gf to leave.. #101368
(815)<kindman34> fubar, how do you spend your time off-line? <fubar-42o> what. you mean like single-player? #101378
(268)*** Joins: Tornus *** ChanServ sets mode: +o Tornus <+WOJ> It's Tornus. <@NiteShok> It sure is. <@GregTG> no it isn't <@GregTG> [/iraqi information minister] #101380
(147)<Admrlcrow> what are some good switches for extracting a rar archives on a linux box, i'm using unrar-3.1.3 <pairo> Admrlcrow: -RTFM #101386
(370)<VanJeans> How do you know when it's time to wash dishes and clean the house? <VanJeans> Look inside your pants; if you have a penis, it's not time. #101435
(705)<Abstract> So I was going to lick my girlfriend last night.. And I was like trying to find her clit, but it's like a fucking labyrinth with all that shit down there.. <LuC3D> Shit? Dude, you were in the wrong hole.. #101490
(535)<rioter> i heard a car accident last night <rioter> and laughed <rioter> then my mum knocked on my door and was like your sister had car acident out side your door and you didnt come out <rioter> and i laughed even harder #101584
(467)<Kionon> "Left, right, front, back, penis in, penis out." <Andris> Dance Dance Reproduction. #101611
(410)* @Magn0lia catches TollsXP and gives him an atomic wedgie * TollsXP 's nether regions emit radiation now * ramoth4 gives TollsXP an iWedge * TollsXP 's nether regions are now manufactured by apple * ramoth4 gives TollsXP a WedgieXP * TollsXP 's nether regions crash < TollsXP> or perhaps they hang ;) < TollsXP> but I certainly hope they don't freeze. #101624
(306)<K2134> holy shit >.< all the guys just ran down the stairs and out the door because the fucking ice cream truck.. talk about immature... <K2134> lmao.. its funny, six 20 year old guys standing in line for ice cream... #101689
(1156)<@Pr|cK> oi shan on sunday last week at footlocker when i was buying new shoes <@Pr|cK> there was this REALLY HOT chick working there right <@Pr|cK> anyway i went in to buy shoes, and she saw my $500 sunnies <@Pr|cK> and she gave me her number <@cray> pfft that's nothing...i went into this shop and waved around my expensive gun, and the chick behind the counter gave me all her money #101690
(854)<Potato> This guy I work with made the mistake of telling me about his whole idea of saving himself for marriage <Potato> But it went something along the lines of "I don't wanna die young, 'cause the longer I'm married, the more sex I'll get" <Potato> I destroyed his little world by asking the only married guy in the store how much sex he gets, to which he replied, "Well, I've got one son, but I'll be damned if I remember how that happened" #101825
(201)<LeXX-> so like one time on 2600 irc, liquidpc shoved a usb cable up his mothers ass. <Klassh> man, usb really IS universal #101850
(321)<sysrq> 10 mins till next period <Nitronium> till your next period? <sysrq> im in school heh <Nitronium> shit, better get home quick then! #101881
(2503)bloodninja: Ok baby, we got to hurry, I don't know how long I can keep it ready for you. j_gurli3: thats ok. ok i'm a japanese schoolgirl, what r u. bloodninja: A Rhinocerus. Well, hung like one, thats for sure. j_gurli3: haha, ok lets go. j_gurli3: i put my hand through ur hair, and kiss u on the neck. bloodninja: I stomp the ground, and snort, to alert you that you are in my breeding territory. j_gurli3: haha, ok, u know that turns me on. j_gurli3: i start unbuttoning ur shirt. bloodninja: Rhinoceruses don't wear shirts. j_gurli3: No, ur not really a Rhinocerus silly, it's just part of the game. bloodninja: Rhinoceruses don't play games. They f*cking charge your ass. j_gurli3: stop, cmon be serious. bloodninja: It doesn't get any more serious than a Rhinocerus about to charge your ass. bloodninja: I stomp my feet, the dust stirs around my tough skinned feet. j_gurli3: thats it. bloodninja: Nostrils flaring, I lower my head. My horn, like some phallic symbol of my potent virility, is the last thing you see as skulls collide and mine remains the victor. You are now a bloody red ragdoll suspended in the air on my mighty horn. bloodninja: Goddam am I hard now. #101979
(247)<Nanobot> I wish I had a girlfriend... <Nanobot> My only friend is a sock puppet <Nanobot> Lucky for me though, it has a hole in it #101988
(357)<Sage> but curiosity <ChaosValentine> killed the cat <Unicorn> technically the cat killed himself, curiosity just convinced it to <gk> no way man <gk> curiosity busted out a switch blade and slit that stupid pussy's throat #102012
(344)<DoctorRiff> man PETA is awesome, hours of entertainment at the cost of one dead rabbit #102016
(896)<manmanandboyboy> date syllabus check <d00fus> dinner, movie, then snuggling <munbty> carnival, cotton candy, and then moonlight stroll <soccy_pants> drugs, rape, 2 hour police chase #102021
(312)<Judg3> well, i get laid too. But you have to keep it secret, or your not as geeky <JPres> I got laid once. <JPres> but mom said it made her feel dirty