#86095 (277)
* inkedmn is BORED
< jbm> inkedmn: drink beers. fuck wife.
< inkedmn> jbm: no beer/money, wife's at work
< jbm> uh. got any pets?
#86099 (457)
<Arrgh> great.. now he's trying to vomit in my shoe
* [TMBJ]Rhadamanthus happydances
<Arrgh> he called it a "vomit capture device"
<[TMBJ]Rhadamanthus> Throw something at him
<Arrgh> like what? my shoe?!
<Arrgh> HE ALREADY HAS IT
#86100 (1008)
Soca: God damn fucking neighbors and their dog need to die
Soca: I just tore up my front lawn with my truck trying to piss them off.  I hope it worked.
drnick: you tore up your own lawn trying to piss of the neighbours
drnick: hmm wheres the logic in that
Soca: Well, I made a lot of noise in the process
Deltan: Yea the joke's really on them with that one
#86104 (650)
<fade> i need to find the stupid adapter now
<Queued> If I had a stupid adapter, I could understand the other half of the channel
<Petter[web]> I resent that.
<Queued> I understand.
#86115 (693)
<LinkDJ> At prom, me and Julea were dancing, and a song came on that I recognised. We're dancing, and halfway through I get a big smile on my face.
<LinkDJ> It turns out it was a song from DDR.
<LinkDJ> I think i've told that much here before
<LinkDJ> What I didn't mention: I started doing finger combinations on her ass.
#86135 (39)
* freebs is playing [ Fiddler On The Roof - If I Were A Rich Man ] ¤ M[X]S
<aNuBiS-> lol
<freebs> i'm very eclectic
<freebs> well if it's spelt right
<aNuBiS-> that fancy speak for, gay?
#86186 (594)
<SJr|Tecra> I'd shit my pants if my girlfriend said she was pregnant.
<robb> i'd shit my pants if you had a girlfriend
#86199 (-169)
<[TMBJ]Harrison> I love bash.org.  All I have to do to be funny is copy/paste. :)
#86204 (293)
<pengo> i dont really care if i'm not normal.. so long as i'm abnormal within the normal range of abnormality.
#86218 (1804)
<NuclearisWinterius> "Without the USA there would be no France, just a greater Germany" and the guest on the show said "Without France, there would be no USA, just a greater England"
<Method> hurray for france!
<Method> without england, there'd be no USA, just a really big canada where they all spoke french.
<Method> i don't know what's worse
<ari> Without Finland, there would be no IRC and this pointless discussion would not be taking place :p
#86224 (489)
<Dirtbiker> howd all of u learn how to do this crap?
<@nomis> hit f1
<@nomis> frequently
<Dirtbiker> in here?
<@nomis> in flash
<Dirtbiker> but thats the shortcut to help
#86228 (300)
<ksennin> "Do the girls have to shave their asses?"
<ksennin> [x] Yes
<ksennin> [ ] Yes
<FT> ksennin: Your definition of 'great' tends to be weird.
<TripleRach> Shave, what
<FT> Try "Shake"
<ksennin> Oh shit.
<ksennin> Yes, "Shake"
#86232 (810)
<Jeff> I'm such a ditz, I dialed my phone number into the microwave
#86246 (-287)
<Enchi|ada> Martin Luther King is a holiday because it is symbolic of the propensity of black people's laziness and unwillingness to work.
#86247 (46)
<timmo> tim would rather fuck a woman who doesnt know what the hell irc is
<c-rOCK> fuck that
<c-rOCK> i want a hottie who can irc it up.
<c-rOCK> and i wanna be like
<c-rOCK> yeah im a mod on bash.org
<c-rOCK> hop on my dick now slut.
#86371 (858)
<Afbc0m> my 3 yr old bro is here
<Afbc0m> he was listening to eminem and started swearing
<Afbc0m> my mom was pissed
<Afbc0m> in the middle of dinner, he was like, "bitch please, get down on yo knees"
#86390 (479)
<[KS]> this one time... at lan camp.. i stuck cat5 up my pussy
#86407 (809)
<Snow> If Grand Theft Auto isn't mankind's greatest invention, I don't know what is.
<Snow> I just flew around the city in an Apache attack helicopter firing missiles and random cars. And when I got bored of that, I stole some guys motorcycle, rode 120mph across town to a nightclub, where I picked up $10,000, walked inside, and fired a minigun into the crowd, liquifying everyone inside.
<Snow> And then I picked up a new suit and went home and called it a day.
<dano> i love how accurate its portrayal of the 1980s night-life is
#86421 (211)
<CodeMason> I never sleep.
<CodeMason> I just lapse into alcohol-induced catatonia on a regular basis.
#86444 (239)
<Dynamo> Do that again, and I will switch your testicles with your eyes.
#86452 (312)
<n3wt> FFS, I am not reading anything with 'The Naughty Goat' in the title
<n3wt> Not unless it has pictures, anyway
#86683 (477)
<Resident_Redneck> The Canadians commited three warships, 1000 soldiers, and 10 tanks to the war effort...but due to the exchange rate, it works out to be a mountie, a moose, and a flying sqirrel.
#86848 (1726)
<cali310> I heard the most ridiculous comment ever made by a newscaster last night on fox........
<cali310> He said, "the Iraqis have hundreds of seasoned suicide bombers"
<cali310> How in the fuck does one become a seasoned suicide bomber?
#86903 (287)
<Uday_Williams> Know what'd be messed up?  If one of Saddam's doubles turned good, and then was appointed to run the country.  Bet that'd confuse alot of people.
#86957 (734)
«TheCulter» guys: two people, /nick and /quit are on a boat. /nick falls off the boat. who's left on the boat?
(@Makenshi`) /quit
(@Makenshi`) duh