#5303 (426)
<@atarax> DrConway: Some kid told me a couple days ago "They just came out with internet 7.0"
#5304 (3020)
<pdksh> jesus h christ
<pdksh> 'i got tired of that screensaver on that other computer so i turned it off'
<pdksh> my sister hard-shutdown my bsd box.
<pdksh> in the middle of a kernel compile.
<pdksh> not to mention that the little blinky light on the hub was annoying her
<pdksh> so she pulled out that wire too
<pdksh> ...
<pdksh> and she managed to rip a wire pair out of the wire.
<pdksh> yet she wants to be a cs major in college.
<dmaster-> I would beat her into a coma
<pdksh> dmaster-: im about to. either that or change her aim password so she jumps off a bridge.
<bob354> pdksh: haha a cs major?
<pdksh> bob354: yeah... 'i like to surf the internet and chat on aim to all my friends all the time so im good with computers and im good at that microsoft wordart. mom said i should go to computer school like you!'
#5307 (442)
<Jewedass> atarax: Find yourself a nice 26 year old woman and pretend she's two 13 year olds
#5309 (269)
<Zexion> Jewdass: well thats what I do when I want to get totally wasted... get some GOOD pot and drink a LOT of GOOD vodka
<|Ogreboy|> <Zexion> we call those weekdays
#5311 (340)
<Mutiny-> "large explosion in downtown jerusalem, two cats scared, houseplant shaken and dropped onto floor, israelis occupy palestinian owned areas, 12 palestinians dead in retalitory missle attacks"
#5314 (194)
<McMoo> i think i dislocated my esophagus
<orion-> fix it with everclear
#5315 (526)
<Knighted> JLsoft: when i was flying into toronto, there was a good deal of cloud coverage and visibility was low. so i looked out the window and immediately though "this is like an N64 game"
#5317 (831)
<Cutter> you know whats a trip ? when one of your friends in high school has to do a speech to the class and does it on acid, gets confused and pisses his pants - that owned
#5320 (517)
<Lucent-H> who wants pictures of high school cheerleaders that want to do me?
<moijkNrg> Lucent: I don't want to see any male cheerleaders
#5324 (271)
<highdrow> when you finally get to the end of all the spam
<highdrow> it's kind of dissapointing that there isn't more to delete
<highdrow> ;
#5332 (255)
<kidpiglet> is there such a thing as putting a "hit" on a dog
<kidpiglet> if so let me know whos avalible to do a "hit"
<Ph4nt0m> marinate a steak in antifreeze
<kidpiglet> yeah with my luck my hubby would go and cook it for himself
<Ph4nt0m> would that be all bad? :)
#5333 (227)
<Ophe|ia`> omg I will NEVER shit that fast again.....my anus is burning *sitting down carefully*
#5337 (410)
<Zeddicus> i like Dungeon Seige, but its not something that hooks me like a good FPS does, or a good RTS
<agentM> i like dating games
<Zeddicus> i dont
<Zeddicus> i always lose
#5338 (1122)
<Carplos-Duck> You just killed 100 innocent civilians, how do you feel?
<Pedro> patriotic
#5345 (74)
<Ramen> When my penis grows in size at the site of a naked male, then I'll believe I'm gay.
#5349 (61)
<Guilty> I dont kid around with my fat chicks
<Guilty> Theres one simple golden rule: No fat chicks.
<Guilty> Golden because thats the color of the Golden Arches, the perferred eating place of Fat Chicks
#5351 (102)
<brad-> I wish excite personals were still easy to look through to bag on people with.
<brad-> And find hot dates.
<LkTruth1> brad- wants to find a mother suitable for his daughter.
<LkTruth1> Or a large man.
<brad-> A little girl suitable to make another.
#5353 (497)
<AlmtyBob> k funny story tiem
<AlmtyBob> there's this guy at work
<AlmtyBob> and back in the days
<AlmtyBob> I would tell people to ask him how fast his dad can run
<AlmtyBob> and they would
<AlmtyBob> and he'd say, 'dude that's kinda fucked up, my dad lost his legs in a construction accident'
<AlmtyBob> and he's a total straight-faced mf, so it got the best reactions from people
<AlmtyBob> (it was a joke, his dad was fine)
<AlmtyBob> I got this new dealer to do it to him today, he's a supervisor
<AlmtyBob> I was talking to my friend later and I told him to go up to this chick and ask the same thing
<AlmtyBob> little did he know, her father was murdered a few years back
<AlmtyBob> joke's on him!
<AlmtyBob> well, you had to be there
#5357 (95)
<+shagman> man, my ice water tastes like shit this morning
<+SuperGayHomo> well don't get it out of the toilet bowl
<@shagman> I wonder if it's my ice cubes
<@shagman> I'm gonna try the ones from the other tray
<@shagman> ahhhhh, much better
<@SuperGayHomo> those ones came from the tank
#5359 (375)
<CountZer0> but where is the recycle bin in dos?
#5362 (298)
<RvLeshrac> I wonder about stores that get shot up in movies.
<RvLeshrac> What do they say when it's all over with?
<RvLeshrac> "Hello, Mutual Insurance? Yes, I'd like to know if my policy covers gangland shootouts."
#5370 (498)
<D1> some new LCDs came out recently.
<D1> which are suppost to be better than the old ones or something.
<McMoo> some new computers came out recently, too
<McMoo> amazingly enough, they're also supposed to be better than old ones.
#5371 (460)
<Focks> "Can I have a fag?" "You're a fag" "I mean a cigeratte, mate" "I'm not your mate, you fag!"
#5376 (572)
<]RE[-NarcDog> damn thats a hard on...
<]RE[-NarcDog> one*
#5378 (51)
<offwYtE> noWay man, tha tis a wikked statement
<offwYtE> well i thought it was
<offwYtE> maybe not sure what it means now