#153529 (333)
<BobXP> imagine if computers were like genes
<BobXP> they'd all be different and not quite work right
<@backdrifts> computers like genes / defective and failure prone / dude, you got a Dell
<@backdrifts> computers like girls / nice curvaceous money traps / dude, you got a Mac
#153553 (245)
<KoNrAdEk> in november turn 21
<KoNrAdEk> so 16 pretty young for me
<spoko_bre> true true
<spoko_bre> but 16 is the freshest u can get without getting g-lined from society
<KoNrAdEk> yea thats true
<KoNrAdEk> but parents could try to give me ban -noexpire
<KoNrAdEk> but i just see her on the other channel
<KoNrAdEk> and baaaaaaaang
<spoko_bre> hahahah
<spoko_bre> yes!
<spoko_bre> sneaky cunt
<spoko_bre> give parents trojan
<spoko_bre> and u can sneak into the house
<spoko_bre> and fuck daughter
<KoNrAdEk> yes x
<KoNrAdEk> hahahhahahahaa
<spoko_bre> and then sneak out
<KoNrAdEk> get her pregnant
<KoNrAdEk> and change nicks
<KoNrAdEk> no1 will kno its me
#153623 (365)
<rdragon> command.com was the filename of the shell in dos
<ih8uungr8> oh i see its on the internet
<@PMP> What does the internet have to do with any of this?
<ih8uungr8> for www.command.com
<rdragon> *slaps his forehead*
<@PMP> Oh god
<ih8uungr8> how do you type
<ih8uungr8> i tried making it fullscreen but that doesnt work
#153638 (933)
<Ironfrost> IRC does something to people
<Ironfrost> if Steven Hawkings went onto IRC he would be talking about porn within 10 minutes
#153676 (559)
<Mr_Vain> that reminds me of an anti-abortion sticker I saw once: "Being a former fetus, I'm against abortion."
<TheXPhial> being a former one celled organism, I'm against menstruation..not much I can do about it
#153683 (493)
<ChrisV82> If you're hiking and you get lost, can't you just eat your own semen for a week?
<ChrisV82> I mean, it has no nutritional value, but at least you'll be masturbating
#153728 (264)
<Shadowline> ya know....begging for ops is rude
<acquacow> heh
<acquacow> well, I got my HL key and q3 key from you
<acquacow> I just figured =)
<acquacow> if I'm gonna whore it
<acquacow> I might as well go all the way
#153819 (742)
<Quizical[GSF]> I am considering changing all the voice files in Half Life to wavs of women orgasming
<TheMaestro> hehe
<Doc|KillinReds> HAHAHAHA
<Quizical[GSF]> I'd never stop using the scientists
<TheMaestro> hahahah
<Doc|KillinReds> Hell the first 15 minute of the game would be crazy
<TheMaestro> ALRIGHT, I GOT THE SHOTGUN!  DIE HEADCRAB!  OHH, UHH, OHHH OH OH OHHHHHHHHHH
<Quizical[GSF]> "We might stand a better chance if we OHHH!  OOHH GOD!  OOHH GOD YES!"
<Spankz> It'd be pretty damn hilarous, considering the lip synching software would cause moments when the scientits would just open up like goatse.
#153841 (3198)
Girl: i like falling asleep with cold pillows by the way
SkibblesMcCheese: That's nice
SkibblesMcCheese: I like bunnies and marshmallows
Girl: well, i'm just lettin ya know so that you can have some cold ones ready for me after our extensive sex fest
Girl: i figured you'd be polite and do that for me
Girl: haha
SkibblesMcCheese: What am I supposed to do, put them in the fridge?
Girl: no, i usually stick mine in the freezer right before i go to bed
SkibblesMcCheese: Seriously?
Girl: for real
SkibblesMcCheese: That just bgave me a stiffie
Girl: hehe
Girl: why?
SkibblesMcCheese: I don't know... just imaging you sticking a pillow in the freezer... it just kinda made me hard, that's all
Girl: bending over to stick it in the freezer?
SkibblesMcCheese: Uhhh... yeah! That was it
Girl: what would u do if you came upon a scene such as that?
SkibblesMcCheese: Do you have clothes on in this scene?
Girl: hrmmm...
Girl: that's a good question
Girl: but... that's up to you
SkibblesMcCheese: So no
SkibblesMcCheese: In which case, I would build a campfire and roast some of those marshmallows
SkibblesMcCheese: It would get pretty chilly with that freezer open
Girl: shaddup!!
Girl: i wanted u to like, come up behind me and grab my hips and just pull me back into u with ur dick hardening against me... but hell, if you wanna make fucking marshmallows... i suppose i can settle for that
SkibblesMcCheese: I really like marshmallows
#153941 (826)
<Macolio> shaid: like last time, I helped scrybe do his chemestry assignment, even though I had no idea what I was doing. Because that's just the type of person I am.
<Shaid> and he failed.
<Macolio> that's irrelevant
#154038 (240)
!¡ Join: (Kiwi) (nama@AC866DE5.ipt.aol.com)
(Kiwi): so wet...
(Kiwi): so juicy....
(Kiwi): so moist...
(Kiwi): mmm...Kiwi
! @S73pH4n|3|Domestic_Warrior poops on kiwi
(@S73pH4n|3|Domestic_Warrior): oh pardon me
(@S73pH4n|3|Domestic_Warrior): was that an aol user?
(Kiwi): yes, yes it was
(@S73pH4n|3|Domestic_Warrior): oopsie
(Kiwi): AOL is the #1 ISP provider
(Kiwi): respect
(@S73pH4n|3|Domestic_Warrior): you should be very proud of yourself
(@S73pH4n|3|Domestic_Warrior): "so easy, no wonder it's #1 among the people who can't tie their own shoe laces"
#154042 (569)
Nezzie:  dude
Nezzie:  this is not cool
Nezzie:  my dealer/cousin got busted
Nezzie:  with fucking 5 pounds + intent to sell
Nezzie:  thats up to 48 years and prison
Nezzie:  A FEDERAL prision
Nezzie:  a federal-pound-me-in-the-ass prison
Nezzie:  and now i dont have a good dealer.
#154043 (1140)
<Poo> norp I will scan you now
<norp> poo so what ports do i have open?
<Poo> I am not looking at ports I am looking at services
<lukeiyo-e> i've run a scan on both of you... i'm not detecting girlfriends
#154048 (287)
<alpha0> dude i shoot smack every day
<alpha0> i am so far from being a drug wuss
<mEta> shooting smakc is for gays
<alpha0> well
<alpha0> considering im now gay
<alpha0> i guess it isnt
<alpha0> not
<alpha0> *
<alpha0> fuck
<alpha0> :(
#154049 (115)
<amped> ok guys, i'm back
<lodg> im sure u were doing something important like watching ppl party from ur window
#154053 (218)
<Orig> twelve monkeys pissed me off
<Orig> there were no monkeys
#154064 (970)
<DetectiveThorn> I don't know if I want to buy this laptop on ebay.  It was "REARELY USED."
<lerpiedood> lmao
#154330 (2059)
<Lilt> I got in a fight one time with a really big guy, and he said, "I'm going to mop the floor with your face." I said, "You'll be sorry." He said, "Oh, yeah? Why?" I said, "Well, you won't be able to get into the corners very well."
#154462 (85)
<DefToanz> I hate ugly girls with big tits...because you want to squeeze their tits, but don't want the rest of the body thats attatched to them
<NEGRO> thats why paper bags are one of the single best invintions ever.
<DefToanz> I prefer plastic...that way she dies and you have a couple days to enjoy them
#154474 (238)
=-= luc has changed the topic to “Nethack: The overly complicated roguelike computer game.”
=-= vaevictus has changed the topic to “Emacshack: The really overly complicated roguelike computer game”
=-= foobarbaz has changed the topic to “Emacshack: The really overly complicated roguelike computer game | Escape+Meta+Alt+Control+Shift+F => Fight monster!”
#154492 (881)
<Lem> so my question is this
<Lem> Agent Smith can replicate himself.. but, why would there be a fork(), if there is no spoon()?
#154501 (1528)
<Neo> I woke up the other morning at 4:00 am to find some woman banging on my door. I was like, WTF?.... So I got up, and let her out.
#154519 (1232)
<Video> anyone know where to get nhl 2004
<MpegMan> Best Buy
<Video> anyone know where to get FREE nhl 2004
<MpegMan> Wear baggy clothing to Best Buy
#154952 (648)
* Gand -> rape a prostitute
<gurov-cali> shoplifting !
#155048 (2)
N e o N e s s 19:  i thought guns were bad
N e o N e s s 19:  FALSE
cleschc2:  dude
N e o N e s s 19:  did you know that jesus and moses used guns to defeat the romans?