QDB — Browse Quotes

#2026 (602)

<DMC[hi]> IF i had a nickel for everytime a black man tried to have sex with me.... i could have built a house made out of nickels in the middle of the woods to secretly masturbate about black men having sex with me

#2027 (369)

<jk-> hheh, back when I was on aol, I would go into chat rooms pretending i was a teenage girl with pictures, and when all the guys would ask me for them I sent em gay porn
<DMC[arf]> i look at gay porn while drinking apple juice sometimes
<datz510> i have some

#2028 (120)

<_Bas> how come cars only have 4/5 gears?
<_Bas> if they make like overdrive on an overdrive
<_Bas> would you get much much gas mileage?

#2030 (295)

<FieroMan> I wanna jerk off but my nose is too stuffy.

#2034 (558)

<Brentai> ...you guys realize that this is the least I've ever laughed. I'm anti-laughing.
<FoxieMoxie> You're anti-laughing? Good, I hope your lungs implode then.

#2037 (744)

<timh> okay, kraken- you don't need to know a person before you talk to them. otherwise there would be severe bootstrapping issues with human interaction

#2039 (313)

<hypr> joker is playing all his vinyl from 1998
<hypr> heh
<hypr> or somthing
<hypr> old ;P
<caspuh> hah
<caspuh> 98?
<caspuh> they had vinyal then?

#2041 (458)

<Mr_Durden> no wonder superman's ship is powered by the only thing that can kill him
<Mr_Durden> it was designed by a canadian

#2046 (117)

<train> i'm on prison net
<train> that still works
<Hooblah> wtf
<Hooblah> prison?
<Hooblah> as in locked up n shit?
<Zebracake> heh!
<Zebracake> no, irc.prison.net

#2047 (706)

<Slander> so what happens to all these trout after they're used for slapping? are they in a pile somewhere?

#2048 (327)

<Birdzii> i've got this fucked rash all over my body
<Morbii> heh
* Slander takes a step back from birdsigh
<Birdzii> heh
<Birdzii> sore throat + rash
<Morbii maybe you're allergic to masturbation
<Morbii> jkjk ;P
<Birdzii> I would have been dead long ago then

#2049 (774)

<Ferney> I think the clog is bonged
<Ferney> LOL
<Ferney> whoa...I think the BONG is CLOGGED

#2050 (109)

<B_Spears> Jimmy Buffet? aww
<Slander> Jimmy rocks man
<Ferney> heh
<B_Spears> yeah, in a rocking chair ;)

#2051 (277)

<Julia_M> Arthur C. Clarke:
<Julia_M> "There is hopeful symbolism in the fact that flags do not wave in a vacuum."
<Julia_M> you know...space?
<Jeff_R> ya
<Julia_M> there can be no nations that can conquer space! aww yea it's great
<Jeff_R> I don't believe the whole vacuum thing...I mean...that would be one big ass Dirt Devil dirt bag to hold all that stuff in space

#2052 (462)

* Arsentia pets his cable modem
* [Toby] fwaps Arsentia. Come to Kansas, the land of tin cups and string.
* PresWRK cuts Arse's modem
* Arsentia cuts Toby's string
*** Quits: [Toby] (...)
<Arsentia> Hey! It actually worked! :)
<[Toby]> Because of you, I had to retie the string.
<[Toby]> Schmuck.
<[Toby]> :)

#2053 (390)

<Gwar> u might as well be holding your penis if you're using a joystick in quake

#2056 (1299)

<Dr_zapp> sek: you find the hex adress?
<Sekmu> yes.
<Dr_zapp> and it is....?
*** Quits: Paco- (irc.best.net *.blackened.com)
*** Quits: Nytefall (irc.best.net *.blackened.com)
*** Quits: PyroGX (irc.best.net *.blackened.com)
*** Quits: liljerk (irc.best.net *.blackened.com)
*** Quits: Karash (irc.best.net *.blackened.com)
*** Quits: _Ender_ (irc.best.net *.blackened.com)
*** Quits: PyroPimp (irc.best.net *.blackened.com)
*** Quits: Sekmu (irc.best.net *.blackened.com)
<Arsentia> This is like when the informer is about to tell the detective the identity of the murderer, and then he gets shot. :)

#2061 (762)

#2062 (751)

<Arsentia> ARRRRRRRGH
<Arsentia> I just lost the fucking picture on my Chem lab!
<Merl> hehehehehe
<Merl> neeeener neeeener ;-)
[Time Passes]
<Merl> FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK
<Merl> I just lost my whole fucking ESSAY i wrote this weekend
<Merl> DAMN MS WORD SHIT
<Assasin> wait
<Assasin> Wait a second.
<Assasin> Was it you who was laughing at Arse?

#2065 (1097)

<matts> hal check your privates
<matts> err
<matts> messages

#2067 (624)

<tobes> Have fun at work? ;)
<Morbii> not particularly ;)
<Morbii> been back home a few hours tho
<Morbii> anything related to the word "work" isn't fun generally :P
<Morbii> pornstars may see things differently, but I wouldn't know
<Morbii> heh!
<tobes> Actually, that would probably get to be a pain in the ass.

#2068 (287)

* Ashboy notices that solidair has changed his alias
<SolidLand> yes.
<Ashboy> wh00p! l8r.
*** Ashboy has quit IRC (yes)
<SolidLand> never seen a guy so excited about my nick change

#2069 (1092)

<Daz-D3> wanna see somethin funny ld?
<LordDeath> No. Please pull your pants back up.

#2074 (334)

<memo> Kazz, do you WANT your dick bit off? Didn't we just have an in-depth discussion earlier today on why that's not a good thing?

#2080 (93)

<kay|oss> i am at work
<epp> hehe.. that's not the worst place to be
<epp> (if there's no airplanes around)