QDB — Browse Quotes

#60708 (759)

* Hitler has entered #world
* Hitler sets mode: -judaism
* Hitler was kicked from #world by Bullet (NO NAZIS)

#60763 (387)

* lavhoes is now known as Jesus
-RPGServ:#pvponline- <Roll for Jesus [1d20]: 12>
<Jesus> JESUS SAVES!

#60805 (687)

<mutey> whats the lowest priority in linux?
<smcn> mutey: ease of use

#60807 (77)

<Russell> he told me to max out the damn card, but I would have felt guilty as hell if I did, so I just ordered 5 games, an S-Video cable, memory card, LOTR extended version, 2 cable extensions, and B&W with expansion

#60822 (418)

<Hinkey> shrooms dont give flashbacks
<Hinkey> acid does
<Threeboy> you now what has the worst flashbacks?
<Threeboy> mother fucking 'NAM man.

#60831 (803)

·[steev]· i used to date this chick, she used to strip naked and rub up and down against me to get me off the computer, it was like, damn it, im busy

#60846 (394)

1:35a (mdxi) twenty-three hours of logs for this month and already 9 searches for "legolas porn" and 2 for, even more disturbingly, "gimli porn"
1:35a (mdxi) some days i think we should all just go back to fidonet

#60865 (-92)

#60866 (589)

<@dustin> tonight is not my night
<@Patrick> ?
<@dustin> i was putting on some socks..and when i was pulled the sock up, my hand slipped and hit my nuts..then i fell over cause it hurt so bad and when i fell i hit my head on the counter
<@dustin> :(
<@Patrick> wheres the fire?
<@dustin> ermm?
<@Patrick> why were you pulling your socks up so fast
<@dustin> i wanted to get back on irc

#60889 (876)

(@Cypher) a hornet just flew inside :/
(Owen) OMG CALL A SWAT TEAM

#60904 (-608)

<Squiggle> Also:the bottom ones [on bash.org] are some of the best
<Squiggle> They're all about niggers
<Squiggle> Niggers = funny
<Sulzanti> Not if you have to be in smelling distance

#60930 (394)

<@jwz> yeah, apparently I was getting shafted by perl's distinction between returning a single value, and returning a single value.

#60932 (152)

<voltstfu> :(
<voltstfu> you suck :(
<voltstfu> i hope you have a hernia that spills into your testicle sack
<voltstfu> and then when they operate
<voltstfu> and resituate the intestinal tract behind a screen of iron mesh in your abdomen
<voltstfu> ...
<voltstfu> fuck it, i think the hernia is bad enough

#60985 (171)

<ex0> i think i'm crazy
<ex0> i talk to myself in real life
<ex0> ... i'm like a real life gollum
<ex0> minus the fugly
<ex0> plus 7 inches

#60996 (382)

<Realfloat> why does gcc makes exe files?
<Apollo-> *blink*
<Apollo-> maybe because it's a compiler?

#60997 (223)

<Godsey> I want to beta test EverQuest 2 and get paid for it
<etrigan> oh i'd do that but so would tons of gamers :/
<Godsey> I'm highly qualified :)
<Godsey> I am fat and have BO

#61020 (150)

<Aurican> i remember when GavJCD tried to nuke me...word nuke in a private msg....he eventually flooded himself off

#61023 (846)

<Waynebo> Today was haiku day in English class!
<Waynebo> My haiku was Guy in front of me/ Does not know he is asian/ Karate chop him
<Waynebo> The guy in front of me's haiku was Guy behind of me / Wants to karate chop me/ I am very scared

#61025 (81)

I like 2eat tape: when i was in 4 th grade there was this awesome 5 grader matthew podawski, i rememeber, and he used to ride his bike to school and mis match socks and and i really wanted to be his friend but he was so weird and he thanked me for the offer but was like "one friend in the world is enough" he then transfered schools

#61048 (475)

<RS-Ryan> crap.. i'm having a blonde moument, what's IGMP again?
<Not_RS_Webby> shit beats the fuck out of me
<Not_RS_Webby> im drunk
<RS-Ryan> God you Cisco support techs suck

#61064 (99)

<aleks_> anybody know of a linux app that performs an operation similar to windows XP's "bridge network"?
<@Lion-O> aleks_: first of all, what does that thing do ?
<PufF-> its a cheat to get around the 'hassle' of subnet'ing
<@Lion-O> aleks_: oh, then I have a solution. Cheat and ask a real admin to set it up for you, then take the glory. I guess the app would be called "mail".

#61085 (247)

<Oolong> <Mansion_Maniac> 3 types of people on the internet = convinced they're ugly, convinced they're life has no meaning, and convinced they could kick your ass despite they don't know jack about you
<Oolong> he forgot convinced they're japanese
<Oolong> "aya, Britney Spears no kawaii desu nyo! ^O^^^O^O^^O^"

#61110 (606)

<Ralp> Does it pop up a window that says "WARNING!! Your computer is currently broadcasting an IP address! With this IP address hackers can immediately begin attack your computer! Click here to enlarge your penis!"

#61127 (202)

<aweigh> Physical pain?
<aweigh> Sign me up.
<WussyBoy> Pain can be fun, but certainly not in a sexual way
<aweigh> Obviously you've never had a donkey punch.
<Galvatron> ...that was in no way appropriate

#61129 (747)

<Paden> some of you people have the smallist ego in the world and you get your jollys off buy ban/kicking someone well thats sad you pick on me becouse i have bad grammer and can't spell good well you need to look you're fag ass in the mirror and look at a dumb fuck who has no life and will never have one and the only girlfrien you ever had was palmla handerson ans her 5 friends
<Alarach> guess that's not me.
<Minion> smallest
<Minion> jollies
<Minion> grammar
<Alarach> because
<Venkmen> because
<Venkmen> grammar
<Alarach> your
<Paden> fuck you
<Minion> haha
<Venkmen> your
<Paden> fuck you
<Alarach> girlfriend