QDB — Browse Quotes

#54019 (95)

<Jason> i've onyl done acid in my eye
<Jason> or snocapped my bud wit it
<Budda> fuck that shit its not gettin near my eyes
<Budda> i mean fuck my lungs
<Budda> but im keepin my eyes

#54029 (368)

<Torontoye> Hi guys,. i have a P90 24mg Ram,.I would like to make it a gateway,. how much Swap space should i give it??
<afterstep> Torontoye: 24 milligrams of ram?
<afterstep> oh, i'd say about an ounce or so of swap.

#54040 (277)

#54046 (440)

<MY2K> can you hear me? :P
<TheDingo> no
* MY2K has left #8-bit.theater
* MY2K has joined #8-bit.theater
<TheDingo> still can't hear you
* MY2K has left #8-bit.theater

#54048 (229)

<Afsan> the question is.. would the fbi suspect a terrorist from a university in Australia? arn't we ment to be the good guys?
<Gothmog> we're everywhere...
<Gothmog> i mean...
<Gothmog> _they're_ everywhere
<Gothmog> phew lucky save there
<Afsan> yes you almost exposed us!
<Afsan> one of your camels must now be castrated!

#54074 (611)

Cat1013: Whoops
Cat1013: I just really confused my grandma.
HermitKing: She has IM?
Cat1013: She just got it. I was talking to her, and she asked about my new car.
Cat1013: I said that it was fine, but that it makes a funny noise whenever I shift.
HermitKing: So?
Cat1013: I left the "f" out of "shift".

#54086 (212)

<Fluff_Daddy|sortofaway> we have two horses outside our halls
<Fluff_Daddy|sortofaway> one of them is hung like a fucking
<Fluff_Daddy|sortofaway> i dunno what man
<Fluff_Daddy|sortofaway> but he has one ginormous fucking penis!
<Fluff_Daddy|sortofaway> I got a picture of it too!!!

#54087 (268)

<Socrates> why do i get .06 kbps from kazaa....
<Socrates> thats 60 bits.. i can almost type that fast

#54099 (1369)

EmoKidDavey: I once masturbated 24 times in 24 hours
Fallen Tabris: O_O
Fallen Tabris: That's really unhealthy.
Fallen Tabris: How much juice did you get out?
Fallen Tabris: when you have so little left, is it even called masturbating any more?
Fallen Tabris: When you've done it that many times in a day.
EmoKidDavey: yeah
EmoKidDavey: a stick comes out and a flag unfurls that says bang

#54110 (201)

<kow> anyone know where active desktop info is stored in win2k?
<kow> like the HTML files
<APE_> same place bill gates hides the porn in win2k
<kow> fuck
<kow> I'm not gonna find it right?
<APE_> theres 200mb worth of porn built into windows, i mean how do u think it got that large?

#54120 (914)

Seppuko I: ever jack a guy off with your feet?
PrettyPrincess1: no
Seppuko I: do you want to?
PrettyPrincess1 no
Seppuko I: would you if asked?
PrettyPrincess1: no
Seppuko I: what if he had a gun to your head?
PrettyPrincess1: yea
Seppuko I: SCORE

#54134 (236)

<Kalony> i thought it was some cool hand of fate deal or something
<dredg> fate needs to deal me a sandwich
<Kalony> fate could deal me a hand job too
<Kalony> preferably after washing its hands
<dredg> and then washing its hands before it made my sandwich

#54142 (148)

MattDavis: i have to re-do an application because i misspelled "republic", leaving out the L
MattDavis: no joke, it says repubic
MattDavis: no spellcheck when you write by hand
MattDavis: that's what i get for masturbating while doing grad school apps

#54163 (139)

<bladezero> Hey guys, i need u to help me solve the porblem i got
<zefer> k, shoot
<bladezero> well i really like this girl and i want to impress her should i buy her a rose?
<zefer> lol, if u wana say u like her with a rose all ure saying is "I'm cheap"
<bladezero> o shit, should i buy her a bouquet then?
<zefer> no cuz then she'll think ure just trying to buy her over
<bladezero> then what do i do damnit, this is like the first girl ive ever really liked
<zefer> buy her some chocolates. U cant go wrong with chocolates, i say when in doubt look to the chocolate.
<bladezero> ok thanks man bye :)
<majinTB> uhh u sure thats a good motto to live by?
<zefer> no ha ha but hes gonna fatten this girl up real nice and then he'll either 1) dump her or 2) she'll get desperate and settle with a loser like him who can't even deal with what to get a girl on a date.
<zefer> way to "let your heart decide."
<majinTB> ha ha yea what a dumbass

#54173 (483)

<Zoogle> So my mom comes in to my room and starts bitching about how pirating software is immoral and wrong and is worse than stealing.
<Zoogle> When she's all done she gives me 2 cd's and says "Oh, and can you copy these for me?"

#54191 (332)

<KamiKaze-> im still a virgin
<KamiKaze-> .
<KamiKaze-> oh shit that msg was meant for jennyf16uk

#54193 (384)

<CowboyNeal> I got email once from someone who said that /. was "tryin to keep a nigga down"
<CowboyNeal> I told him I didn't appreciate him using that term to refer to our people
<CowboyNeal> race card played and redealt, muhahaha

#54202 (373)

<+skrath> I don't think I'm better than others, it just so happens that so far, statistically, I am

#54203 (515)

<`Grimm`> you know whats the darndest thing is? its when you mom calls you a son of a bitch, im like, wait a minute, who's the bitch?

#54223 (566)

DibbLe: ive come to a realization
Daemonite: ?
DibbLe: violent games like cs, bf1942 and quake DO influence kids to shoot people and commit violent acts
DibbLe: but not because theyre imitating the game, its because everyone who plays them acts SO FUCKING STUPID YOU HOPE THEY ALL DIE

#54237 (93)

<Soul`is`away> I was ashamed of the latest KMart catalogue
<Soul`is`away> Flipped to the games bit...
<Soul`is`away> Xbox and PS2, but no cube AT ALL
<risq> there are no gamecubes in ANY catalogues
<Soul`is`away> WHY NOT!>
<Onikage> maybe after they put in the xbox, there was no room for the cube

#54239 (453)

<Loco-san> I'm gonna make a game called With Myself, so kids will say "I'm gonna go play With Myself" and freak their parents/friends out

#54240 (296)

<Macabre> dammit, y'know what? tday I was waiting for a cab, and the chick next to me was like, hey cutie. And I wink, then she looks down at my crotch, smiles for abit, then smacks my face.
<Macabre> IN FROTN OF ALMSOT 500 FUKCING PEPLE!!
<Macabre> Y'know why?
<Macabre> BEcause I was holing my handphone in my right hand pocket, and it started vibrating because I got a call. I dunno about yous guys phones, but mine vibrates like a pussy vibrator, ie really pwoerfully
<Macabre> she must have thought I was wacking to her or something.. :(

#54244 (188)

<|Robot|Pimpbot> I SWEAR TO GOD I WISH I COULD JUST REACH THROUGH THE INTERNET AND KILL PPL SOMETIMES
<|Robot|Pimpbot> does anyone know if that will be part of Internet v2?
<{RA}SKY-UED3> yeah
<{RA}SKY-UED3> but youll have to pay a tax on it
<{RA}SKY-UED3> and stand in a line
<|Robot|Pimpbot> im willing

#54250 (356)

<Keiichi> the BSOD doesn't mean you win anything
<PrettzL> It's not like triple sevens :P
<Keiichi> not even close
<Keiichi> it's more like the slot machine punches you in the face and laughs