#17281 (168)
<Spud> When I can't play my games I like to smash things
<Spud> Or fap
<Tetrad> same thing basically
#17291 (1157)
<Isajeep> in fotr when gandalf first goes to see that other gay wizard what does he first say to him?
<NickBlasta> stfu noob
<Setzer> stfu noob
<CRC> he says: "sup dawg, i r g4nd4lf da gr3y!"
<CRC> we should get the script to LOTR and make it l33t
<DC4ever> CRC - and then add subtitles to the avi of it, and rename it "L0rd of teh r1ngz0rs!"
<CRC> legolas: chex0r this out! *stabs orc in eye with arrow* LOL! di3 f00l! *shoots another orc with arrow* pwned!
<[H]Slacker> divx?
<NickBlasta> orc: CHEATER CHEATER WALLHACK!!1
<CRC> (when pippin/merry/whichever the fuck knocks the armor down the well) Gandalf: omg, noob!
#17295 (46)
<Claus> I was a female black woman in a past life according to this site
#17297 (379)
<Enhanced> but ya i'm gonna paint my intake on my car
<Enhanced> can i use spray paint?
<NT5> ummm..... what other kind of paint did you think there was available?? latex flat wall?
<Roppongi> finger paint
<Enhanced> i just dont wanna use paintbrush kind of paint
<NT5> lol
<NT5> paintbrush kind of paint.... that's good
<NT5> get out the roller billy-bubba
<Enhanced> well shit i dont know anything about paint
<Enhanced> except finger paint
<NT5> we gonna paint us a car
#17301 (155)
<Claus> I sell children to old women
<Claus> and they stuff them up their uterus
<Isajeep> oh my god
#17323 (167)
<[Banned-H]G-Daddy> oh geez, oh geez... my roomate was doing a mission in GTA3 (the one where you pick up the limo and all the mafia guys), well anyways, all the fish trucks are hitting him and blocking him in.  finally he gets by but not before he catches fire and blows up.. he then punches his monitor, that's when i leave.  i hear a keyboard getting slapped something hitting a wall and stuff falling off his desk.. all to the words of "FUCK YOU, FUCK THIS, GOD DAMNIT! FUCK FUCK FUCK SHIT!!!"  oh jesus, he was sincere too.. it's like that vid where the guy threw his monitor down the stair well
#17326 (29)
<[56]Firestorm_dude_slick> is there anyway to play a 350 mhz game on a 300 mhz processor?
#17327 (266)
<Dragon-Beast> Not being a genius doesn't mean I would be a dumbass.
<Frozen-Solid> in your case it does
<Dragon-Beast> My case?
<Dragon-Beast> Why would it be my case?
<Frozen-Solid> because you are a dumbass
#17333 (285)
<MisterZ> You're all retards, only retards join this channel hahahaha!
#17334 (301)
<Xetrov`> im gonna go try out this "physical activity" shit i keep hearing about
#17335 (204)
<Balatro> Electroly:  It died on me once and wouldn't restart.  I had to ps -aux or whatever the fuck it is and kill the process.  Then it started fine.
<Electroly> ah, nothing good old `ps aux | grep Proteus | awk '{print $2 }' | xargs kill -9` won't fix.
<Electroly> much better, that worked.
* Gandalf stares at Electroly
<Gandalf> And I thought I was a Unix dork.
<Balatro> Yeah, it was so much less effort to do that then to type a command, quickly see the process and kill it by PID :)
<Electroly> you are a unix dork
<Electroly> Balatro: there were like 10 Proteus processes, dude.
<Balatro> Funny, I had 1 ;)
<Electroly> dunno where these all came from, but i killed them all.
<Electroly> now all is well
<Gandalf> Electroly: I understand ps, grep, and xargs. Explain how that awk thinger works, though? :)
<Electroly> Gandalf: awk is pretty simple.  it treats the stdin as a bunch of columns
<Electroly> and lets you reformat the output.  { print $n } is typical, where n is the column number to print out.
<kurros> AWK AWK MOTHER FUCKER
<Electroly> it uses whitespace as the column delimiter by default, but you can change that by some argument to it
<Gandalf> ah, and in ps aux the PID is the second column, thus $2, right?
<Electroly> yup
<Electroly> you can do other stuff with awk, like awk '{ print "Whee!  The PID for " $10 " is " $2 "!" }'
<Balatro> It makes me hot when you talk unix.
<Electroly> rm -rf /home/Balatro
<Balatro> That's /homo/Balatro, honey :)
#17337 (281)
*** Topic is '#Animorphs: Part of a complete breakfast! Now with Vitamins A, B1, OMG and WTF!'
#17340 (333)
<reston> make jizz ice cubes
<reston> thats a fun party prank
<stu> you realize that's cryogenics
<reston> yeah but imagine when a chick puts one in her drink
<stu> what if she puts it up her twat
<reston> the sperm will be dead
<stu> she could get pregnant from an icecube
<stu> no it wouldn't
<reston> yea it would
<stu> uh.
<stu> how do you think IVF works?
<reston> theyre organisms
<reston> theyd die
<reston> i dunno
<reston> you know too much about sperm
<stu> well, i have a lot.
#17344 (367)
<homeslice> <Arbo> I'm making a personal call to tell someone I'll be working through lunch, and I get fired for it.
<kitten> A PERSONAL CALL
<kitten> YOU MONSTER
<kitten> YOU SHOULD BE HANGED
<homeslice> He's going to hell now.
<homeslice> That's like the 14th commandment.
<homeslice> On the tablet that Moses broke.
<kitten> I think the 11th was "Thou Shalt Not Pay A Lot For A Muffler".
#17345 (105)
<Mal> dom: hey, when are you gonna put the MMM pics up? or did you not recieve any yet? :]
<kinzillah> Mal: why do you want pictures of men in boxers?
<Mal> kinzillah: because I was one of them :]
#17346 (134)
<harb> I'm good at designing things, usually.
<harb> Implemting is another matter. :|
<harb> Implementing. blah.
<homeslice> Spelling also poses a problem.
#17347 (291)
<kinzillah> I'm going to build a random number generator that works, it will be a small mechanical device that shakes dice and then reads what number came up, then we will have real random number in computers, none of this seeding with the timer shit.
#17352 (406)
<+ParaBytes> i have this weird problem
<+GoodScrat> rub vasoline on it and don't play with it for a week
#17357 (89)
<||Rune||> and I do have it , but I dont dcc
<Nullifier> Use a DCCondom ||Rune||
<||Rune||> dude they break
#17359 (428)
«+kennyv» drakkhen: heh, a buddy of mine offered me a p3 800mhz for 80 bucks about a year ago
«+kennyv» but i was like "GRRR FUCK INTEL BITCH"
«+kennyv» then i carved an amd logo into my chest with an old isa sound card
#17361 (284)
(@Thwark): if masturbating improved penis growth, not only would we all *know*, but it would have entire library wings dedicated to the study.
#17363 (84)
<@SixSyx6> ugly is ok as long as I don't have to kiss them
<@SixSyx6> or look at them
#17373 (328)
<LoRdZephyR> i cant swim
<roboman20> i thought only people with down syndrome couldnt swim
<LoRdZephyR> WELL YOUR WRONG WHORE
* roboman20 hands zeph a chromosome
#17380 (879)
<SLC> there is a new mp3 addon in the defalt mIRC-releases!!
<SLC> if ya wan to hear a Backstreet Boys song then  type /quit playing games with my heart
<SLC> some guy i just talked to said so!! he said it only worked with that song at first, to make it active!!
*** SLC (badass@pc248.cab60a.comtrade.ee) Quit (playing games with my heart)
#17388 (545)
<TheBusDriver> the ping from me to the end of my penis is like 3 minutes